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I am Running for President
alma1
#1 Posted : Saturday, April 01, 2017 1:21:37 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 9/19/2015
Posts: 2,871
Location: hapo
Enough of these people.

I think you know my nonsense

I'm declaring myself in 2022.

I can't do 2017 for obvious reasons

1. Muthamaki syndrome
2. Surely, as harrydre can prove, sina pesa
3. hardwood wants me to get a job for his sister...upus..sister might be a donuts carnival.
4. I don't have the Singh syndrome
5. Muthamaki must come. What's the proof


After weighing my options. I shall not become like the Nairobi albino who turns up after 5 years. After all, why does he have to campaign. I just buy Kameme.

I have the women votes too.

Just because you saw me sucking sonkos [****]. Before you shoot me, learn the meaning of irony, etc... I was not, have never done what I wrote...But you can sue me if you are Njunge with money.

Shows you how far I can go for you. After all when this kalenjin tells me he loves me more than his wife....surely.....He's a lawyer. He knows which part of my booty to touch..hehe. Which lawyer...What's the meaning of booty? Now sue me.


I'm going to be president. I promise

My wife....she walks to work..Sina gari...But she will set up a no walking to work program. In fact she's accepted to walk without bus fair

mmmmhhhhh

Since I'm runing for president. Let's shoot all the doctors. I have Itumnis number. You know...The guy who hackecd IDD,,,,DDDD,

He shall say how a doctor is useless. In the hope that no one notices. After all, nurses wear the same white clothes as doctors.

Vote for me people..Like seriously.

Vote for Sonko...Not Joho - Joho is a drug dealer
Vote for Waitutu...Not the guy who's party ended up with a dead chick on waiwaki way.
Vote for Raguma...Many many wheelbarrows for Raoila. We need Raira in our lives forever.

My name is alma...The only persom who cares is admin and harrdre/ After all, harrydre cares so much for me. he shall pay my rent


I'm running for president. Kesho. Coz raira sharo nefa mbe. Uhuru, doesn't have a degree.

Vote for me. After all, I don't pay taxex. I'm hot like that.

Ngalaka, kweri, rogo?

Thieves are not good people. Tumeelewana?

washiku
#2 Posted : Saturday, April 01, 2017 1:30:05 AM
Rank: Chief


Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
alma1
#3 Posted : Saturday, April 01, 2017 1:40:20 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 9/19/2015
Posts: 2,871
Location: hapo
washiku wrote:
Old Cheap Liquor


Bilongi u u

ohhh lisumba ninii?


Thieves are not good people. Tumeelewana?

washiku
#4 Posted : Saturday, April 01, 2017 2:05:45 AM
Rank: Chief


Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
alma1 wrote:
washiku wrote:
Old Cheap Liquor


Bilongi u u

ohhh lisumba ninii?




Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly

Had you ordered a bigger one?

alma1
#5 Posted : Saturday, April 01, 2017 2:25:33 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 9/19/2015
Posts: 2,871
Location: hapo
washiku wrote:
alma1 wrote:
washiku wrote:
Old Cheap Liquor


Bilongi u u

ohhh lisumba ninii?




Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly

Had you ordered a bigger one?



Washiku

I'm very serious.

Sasa were you come here with shufa shia viceroy?"


In fact since you have annoyed me.

I'm running for president in 3017


I want to know how many people other than harrdre are going to vote for me...


And Ngalaka I paid for all Franco songs....You can find them on Youtube.

Lakini Washiku, I'm running. I WANT one wazuan to vote for me. tafadhali.
Thieves are not good people. Tumeelewana?

washiku
#6 Posted : Saturday, April 01, 2017 2:37:37 AM
Rank: Chief


Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
alma1 wrote:
washiku wrote:
alma1 wrote:
washiku wrote:
Old Cheap Liquor


Bilongi u u

ohhh lisumba ninii?




Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly

Had you ordered a bigger one?



Washiku

I'm very serious.

Sasa were you come here with shufa shia viceroy?"


In fact since you have annoyed me.

I'm running for president in 3017


I want to know how many people other than harrdre are going to vote for me...


And Ngalaka I paid for all Franco songs....You can find them on Youtube.

Lakini Washiku, I'm running. I WANT one wazuan to vote for me. tafadhali.


Of course you know you are my valuable friend. I will vote for you coz the post you are going for is not filled in my ballot. But Viceroy seems to produce feel good effects. I might consider it in future

alma1
#7 Posted : Saturday, April 01, 2017 2:58:49 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 9/19/2015
Posts: 2,871
Location: hapo
You can't discredit me!!!!!Viceroy is a water mixture acepted by Uhuru Kenyatta.

And I'm yelling.

Even Big chick knows I'm hotter than Wetangula..Bigchick stop getting for small..mmmhhh

I have seen what you, these people do... I don't need Impunity..To know

You divide us. That is why now I listen to Kameme, the honest seriously, like I'm serious, like I'm going to tell you the truth, after all I love muthamaki, like seriously, I'm not lying, station. If you say muthamaki smokes embassy, na akikosa embassy ni SM, we shall say your mother was raped by a jaruo. And that's why you are not yellow yellow...

As the candidate who shall make Uhuru get a degree from Amehrst. I promise you, the only way I can be bought is with nothing...Nothing other than proof of Viceroy in my house ever friday.

Nothing feels better than a Viceroy on Friday...It's nice. Try it Bigchick, wachana na Wetangula. Try Viceroy...Please imagine a huge guy holding a bottle viceroy, next to you.

You can't discredit me!!!!!!

Like Masukuma, I know IT. In fact, I taught Itumbi how to hack ICC....Washiku, all you know is being an employee of safaricom...We are hacking safcom kesho. Watch your mpesa...Kwanza since this fellow was married to these people, safcom kwisaaaa! Ati murchr the safcom lover is the only human being who loves a monopoly..He must be an employee....oooopppps. That was just my computer going haywire.


I shall be president....Mpendea msipende...

Let me see Pauline Wanjiru say shit...But she's hot...aiiiiii!!!!\\\\Pauline, no reason to hide you username on wazua...Love conquers all...And maybe just maybe...ok I'm kidding but don't forget Muhammed Ali became the champion after a lot of .....thinking. Thus far, tell her she's hot...I actually like her.

I call it no lying woman left alone program.

Anyway, what I was saying was, Uhuru is not Franco Makiadi. I can't see how a human being votes for this fella.

But

I've accepted....

Life is a funny thing.I'm sure he wakes up in the morning and asks himself....Yaani, hawa watu have accepted? Sasa wanataka nifanye nini?
Thieves are not good people. Tumeelewana?

Bigchick
#8 Posted : Saturday, April 01, 2017 6:17:25 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/8/2013
Posts: 4,068
Location: At Large.
washiku wrote:
Old Cheap Liquor



Me thinks its a combination of many things among them 3rd generation(Chrome),Muratina and some wet seeds of some contraband

We shall vote for you @Alma in the local bar polls.
Love is beautiful and so are those who share it.With Love, Marriage is an amazing event in ones life time, the foundation of joy, happiness and success.
Ngalaka
#9 Posted : Saturday, April 01, 2017 10:03:48 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 10/29/2008
Posts: 1,566
Hii mambo ya Friday after 430 inakuaa woozy, topsy-turvy likeLaughing out loudly
Lakini yoote ni fault ya Jubirii!

But seriously, ukisimama kura yangu unayo.
Na hiyo rhumba sio mbaya.

Ukiingia huko house on the hill, utenge siku moja jioni - kama Friday hivi iwe ya kisikiza hizo nationwide - by presidential decreeLaughing out loudly
Na 'decree' ingine upee Joho waache kumsumbua.
Isuni yilu yi maa me muyo - ni Mbisuu
aemathenge
#10 Posted : Saturday, April 01, 2017 12:42:43 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 10/18/2008
Posts: 3,434
Location: Kerugoya
Citizens of the Virtual Republic of Wazua, could someone be so kind and let me know what time fooling people on April Fools Day officially ends?

I was contemplating declaring officially that I am not only reneging on my declaration not to vote, but actually registering as a voter, campaigning for and voting for The Right Honorable Raila Amolo Odinga, Honorable Martha Karua et al.

However, I cannot do this, declare, register, campaign and vote for the aforementioned until I know what time stupidity and taking right thinking Kenians for fools ends.

Someone indulge me, please?

Please?
Njung'e
#11 Posted : Sunday, April 02, 2017 11:38:59 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/7/2007
Posts: 11,935
Location: Nairobi
I'll twit the FKF President, Nick Mwendwa, to inform him that he has compe in the next election. Kindly be informed also, that the next FKF elections will be in 2019 and not 2022. I'm mildly surprised though. I didn't know you have interest in football. You would have had my vote but heck, i am not an FKF delegate and i do not know of any Wazuan who is. Unaweza jaribu Alba?smile
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
Euge
#12 Posted : Sunday, April 02, 2017 1:05:15 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 8/4/2008
Posts: 2,849
Location: Rupi
Alma you need to change your diet.
Whatever you are eating is not good for you. And we dont want to loose you
Lord, thank you!
tycho
#13 Posted : Monday, April 03, 2017 1:24:39 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/1/2011
Posts: 8,804
Location: Nairobi
aemathenge wrote:
Citizens of the Virtual Republic of Wazua, could someone be so kind and let me know what time fooling people on April Fools Day officially ends?

I was contemplating declaring officially that I am not only reneging on my declaration not to vote, but actually registering as a voter, campaigning for and voting for The Right Honorable Raila Amolo Odinga, Honorable Martha Karua et al.

However, I cannot do this, declare, register, campaign and vote for the aforementioned until I know what time stupidity and taking right thinking Kenians for fools ends.

Someone indulge me, please?

Please?


Thinking is always constrained. The question should start as 'what's right thinking'?
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