Rank: Member Joined: 12/17/2011 Posts: 887
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What's the purpose of a wedding if you can't afford one? Do people really have to have a wedding? It's ok if you can afford to feed people who will later on criticize everything from the venue, the food and the cake that you worked so hard to organize for, lol, but if you can't afford one, is it really worth it to run around helter skelter fund-raising and inconveniencing people to contribute money just so you can say that you had a wedding that people will forget about after two months anyway? Do the people who got married love each other more than those who didn't? I actually think that even if you can afford it, most weddings are a waste of time and a subtle way of bragging. But I have never been known to be conventional, so there.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 3/27/2009 Posts: 1,437
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hamburglar wrote:What's the purpose of a wedding if you can't afford one? Do people really have to have a wedding? It's ok if you can afford to feed people who will later on criticize everything from the venue, the food and the cake that you worked so hard to organize for, lol, but if you can't afford one, is it really worth it to run around helter skelter fund-raising and inconveniencing people to contribute money just so you can say that you had a wedding that people will forget about after two months anyway? Do the people who got married love each other more than those who didn't? I actually think that even if you can afford it, most weddings are a waste of time and a subtle way of bragging. But I have never been known to be conventional, so there. It's that season again that all and sundry are conducting their weddings. People that have not spoken to you in years will remember you are their closest friend and give you a slot in the planning committee. I ignore such invitations.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/18/2011 Posts: 12,069 Location: Kianjokoma
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You mean big weddings. A colleague did a wedding the other day kwa AG. In attendance were just 2 witnesses
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/7/2007 Posts: 11,935 Location: Nairobi
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hamburglar wrote:What's the purpose of a wedding if you can't afford one? Do people really have to have a wedding? It's ok if you can afford to feed people who will later on criticize everything from the venue, the food and the cake that you worked so hard to organize for, lol, but if you can't afford one, is it really worth it to run around helter skelter fund-raising and inconveniencing people to contribute money just so you can say that you had a wedding that people will forget about after two months anyway? Do the people who got married love each other more than those who didn't? I actually think that even if you can afford it, most weddings are a waste of time and a subtle way of bragging. But I have never been known to be conventional, so there. The way you think, i really wouldn't be surprised if you organised a one person wedding complete with half baked brown ugali for a cake! ...and then you eat it! Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
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Rank: Member Joined: 12/17/2011 Posts: 887
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Lolest! wrote:You mean big weddings.
A colleague did a wedding the other day kwa AG. In attendance were just 2 witnesses I honestly think that's the best way to do it. I have an employee who is planning his wedding and he has been getting on my nerves a lot. I have already lent him my car severally to go to the in-laws, given him cash advances that i let slide at the end of the month, he wants me to be chairman of his committee which is basically telling me that he expects me to contribute a huge chunk of my money. He wants me to use my connections to get him a good venue, a wedding planner, am like, "is this supposed to be my wedding or what?". I am at the point where I really feel like telling him to cut his cloth according to his size or just forget the whole thing altogether. I can help Kidogo, i am ok with that, but i feel like some people take advantage of this wedding business to really inconvenience others with wedding committees and cash donations because they feel like they are entitled since they are having a wedding and we have to help out, whether we like it or not. If people can't do some things for themselves, then it's not a must you have a wedding. It's not a matter of life and death. When my time comes, I will happily go to the AG and seal the deal there. The millions that I would have spent on a wedding to feed strangers and relatives, half of whom i don't like anyway, will look good in my bank account. I hate to throw my employee under the bus because he is a good guy but this wedding nonsense is making him irrational and putting unnecessary pressure on him to pull off something he clearly can't afford. Sasa inakuwa shida yangu.
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Rank: Chief Joined: 5/9/2007 Posts: 13,095
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And instead of telling him that you thought the best way for him to know that you wont help or not willing to help is to whine in Wazua? Let people do the weddings they want. Even going to AG involves some cost which some people can't afford. Even spending 50k is extravagant for some, while 500k is small change for some. The easiest way we can solve these things is letting people know when we are not willing to help. But now that we still contribute and complain silently, weddings will continue happening, big time. I am wondering which is the most lucrative part we invest in being service providers?
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/18/2011 Posts: 12,069 Location: Kianjokoma
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I am inclined towards a small wedding but I have painfully come to acknowledge that big weddings with a committee preceded by those useless milking trips to in-laws are part of our culture I do not withhold help for those I like as a result. But i still dislike the culture
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/2/2009 Posts: 26,328 Location: Masada
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I NEVER CONTRIBUTE TO THOSE KIND OF WEDDINGS! Portfolio: Sold You know you've made it when you get a parking space for your yatcht.
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Rank: Member Joined: 12/17/2011 Posts: 887
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washiku wrote:And instead of telling him that you thought the best way for him to know that you wont help or not willing to help is to whine in Wazua?
Let people do the weddings they want. Even going to AG involves some cost which some people can't afford. Even spending 50k is extravagant for some, while 500k is small change for some.
The easiest way we can solve these things is letting people know when we are not willing to help. But now that we still contribute and complain silently, weddings will continue happening, big time.
I am wondering which is the most lucrative part we invest in being service providers? There is a difference between whining and starting a discussion for people to debate. Stop attacking the messenger and contribute to the topic. Topic is about weddings and not hamburglar. Kapish? Why do I have a feeling that I am really resented around here? Attacks from all directions. Lol.
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Rank: Member Joined: 12/17/2011 Posts: 887
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Njung'e wrote:hamburglar wrote:What's the purpose of a wedding if you can't afford one? Do people really have to have a wedding? It's ok if you can afford to feed people who will later on criticize everything from the venue, the food and the cake that you worked so hard to organize for, lol, but if you can't afford one, is it really worth it to run around helter skelter fund-raising and inconveniencing people to contribute money just so you can say that you had a wedding that people will forget about after two months anyway? Do the people who got married love each other more than those who didn't? I actually think that even if you can afford it, most weddings are a waste of time and a subtle way of bragging. But I have never been known to be conventional, so there. The way you think, i really wouldn't be surprised if you organised a one person wedding complete with half baked brown ugali for a cake! ...and then you eat it! Honestly. If I get an understanding spouse, I can very well see myself doing this. We can go to the AG, sign the paperwork, then come back home and have cake. Kwisha maneno.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/2/2009 Posts: 26,328 Location: Masada
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hamburglar wrote:washiku wrote:And instead of telling him that you thought the best way for him to know that you wont help or not willing to help is to whine in Wazua?
Let people do the weddings they want. Even going to AG involves some cost which some people can't afford. Even spending 50k is extravagant for some, while 500k is small change for some.
The easiest way we can solve these things is letting people know when we are not willing to help. But now that we still contribute and complain silently, weddings will continue happening, big time.
I am wondering which is the most lucrative part we invest in being service providers? There is a difference between whining and starting a discussion for people to debate. Stop attacking the messenger and contribute to the topic. Topic is about weddings and not hamburglar. Kapish? Why do I have a feeling that I am really resented around here? Attacks from all directions. Lol. Lest you forget, 95% women love wedding while 95% of men loath wedding. @washiku is a feminista fyi, attack anything a woman loves and he will be on your case, including attacking a woman's flat ass. Portfolio: Sold You know you've made it when you get a parking space for your yatcht.
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Rank: Member Joined: 2/3/2015 Posts: 126 Location: Nairobi
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We were made to believe that a wedding is the Godly (Christian) way to start a marriage. If that was true, it should be possible to either do it during the church service or immediately after With no drama, flowers and not a single cent spent. Today,the poor cannot afford a church wedding meaning that poverty now excludes you from starting a marriage in the Christian way. Today's Wedding is a pure show off or meant to affirm, prove a point or meet the expectations of friends. Its a celeb thing which we have adopted. Did you know that in the early Church, a wedding was not a church affair? Wedding as a church affair was introduced by the Catholic Church in 1563. Actually, church reformers wanted wedding excluded from church because they thought it was not a church affair. Did you know that most of the things we do today during the wedding ceremony including bridal party, rings were either started for reasons nothing to do with Christianity or borrowed from English Culture and nothing to do with Christianity?
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 9/11/2015 Posts: 1,024
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timizo wrote:We were made to believe that a wedding is the Godly (Christian) way to start a marriage. If that was true, it should be possible to either do it during the church service or immediately after With no drama, flowers and not a single cent spent. Today,the poor cannot afford a church wedding meaning that poverty now excludes you from starting a marriage in the Christian way. Today's Marriage is a pure show off or meant to affirm, prove a point or meet the expectations of friends. Its a celeb thing which we have adopted. Did you know that in the early Church, a wedding was not a church affair? Wedding as a church affair was introduced by the Catholic Church in 1563. Actually, church reformers wanted wedding excluded from church because they thought it was not a church affair. Did you know that most of the things we do today during the wedding ceremony including bridal party, rings were either started for reasons nothing to do with Christianity or borrowed from English Culture and nothing to do with Christianity? Interesting, as there is also no biblical character who did a wedding as we now know and take weddings to be. Had not looked at it like that. Anyway, I wonder why the premium put on traditional 'weddings' when it's 'marriage' that really matters and is under threat.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 9/11/2015 Posts: 1,024
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Impunity wrote:hamburglar wrote:washiku wrote:And instead of telling him that you thought the best way for him to know that you wont help or not willing to help is to whine in Wazua?
Let people do the weddings they want. Even going to AG involves some cost which some people can't afford. Even spending 50k is extravagant for some, while 500k is small change for some.
The easiest way we can solve these things is letting people know when we are not willing to help. But now that we still contribute and complain silently, weddings will continue happening, big time.
I am wondering which is the most lucrative part we invest in being service providers? There is a difference between whining and starting a discussion for people to debate. Stop attacking the messenger and contribute to the topic. Topic is about weddings and not hamburglar. Kapish? Why do I have a feeling that I am really resented around here? Attacks from all directions. Lol. Lest you forget, 95% women love wedding while 95% of men loath wedding. @washiku is a feminista fyi, attack anything a woman loves and he will be on your case, including attacking a woman's flat ass. lol
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Rank: Elder Joined: 9/23/2009 Posts: 8,083 Location: Enk are Nyirobi
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A wedding is a bash like any other. When I am invited I go, I eat, I drink, I dance and give the couple a bahasha so that they can throw us many more weddings. I love weddings. Life is short. Live passionately.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/22/2009 Posts: 2,449 Location: Africa
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Anti_Burglar wrote:timizo wrote:We were made to believe that a wedding is the Godly (Christian) way to start a marriage. If that was true, it should be possible to either do it during the church service or immediately after With no drama, flowers and not a single cent spent. Today,the poor cannot afford a church wedding meaning that poverty now excludes you from starting a marriage in the Christian way. Today's Marriage is a pure show off or meant to affirm, prove a point or meet the expectations of friends. Its a celeb thing which we have adopted. Did you know that in the early Church, a wedding was not a church affair? Wedding as a church affair was introduced by the Catholic Church in 1563. Actually, church reformers wanted wedding excluded from church because they thought it was not a church affair. Did you know that most of the things we do today during the wedding ceremony including bridal party, rings were either started for reasons nothing to do with Christianity or borrowed from English Culture and nothing to do with Christianity? Interesting, as there is also no biblical character who did a wedding as we now know and take weddings to be. Had not looked at it like that. Anyway, I wonder why the premium put on traditional 'weddings' when it's 'marriage' that really matters and is under threat. There was the wedding at Cana where Jesus turned water into wine
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 9/11/2015 Posts: 1,024
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Shak wrote:Anti_Burglar wrote:timizo wrote:We were made to believe that a wedding is the Godly (Christian) way to start a marriage. If that was true, it should be possible to either do it during the church service or immediately after With no drama, flowers and not a single cent spent. Today,the poor cannot afford a church wedding meaning that poverty now excludes you from starting a marriage in the Christian way. Today's Marriage is a pure show off or meant to affirm, prove a point or meet the expectations of friends. Its a celeb thing which we have adopted. Did you know that in the early Church, a wedding was not a church affair? Wedding as a church affair was introduced by the Catholic Church in 1563. Actually, church reformers wanted wedding excluded from church because they thought it was not a church affair. Did you know that most of the things we do today during the wedding ceremony including bridal party, rings were either started for reasons nothing to do with Christianity or borrowed from English Culture and nothing to do with Christianity? Interesting, as there is also no biblical character who did a wedding as we now know and take weddings to be. Had not looked at it like that. Anyway, I wonder why the premium put on traditional 'weddings' when it's 'marriage' that really matters and is under threat. There was the wedding at Cana where Jesus turned water into wine I thought about it, and I agree the only convergence is that many people came to eat. The parable of the 10 virgins shows virgins waiting at night for the bridegroom to come which does not happen today.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 1/3/2014 Posts: 1,063
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Njung'e wrote:hamburglar wrote:What's the purpose of a wedding if you can't afford one? Do people really have to have a wedding? It's ok if you can afford to feed people who will later on criticize everything from the venue, the food and the cake that you worked so hard to organize for, lol, but if you can't afford one, is it really worth it to run around helter skelter fund-raising and inconveniencing people to contribute money just so you can say that you had a wedding that people will forget about after two months anyway? Do the people who got married love each other more than those who didn't? I actually think that even if you can afford it, most weddings are a waste of time and a subtle way of bragging. But I have never been known to be conventional, so there. The way you think, i really wouldn't be surprised if you organised a one person wedding complete with half baked brown ugali for a cake! ...and then you eat it! Consistency is better than intensity
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Rank: Member Joined: 2/3/2015 Posts: 126 Location: Nairobi
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Shak wrote:Anti_Burglar wrote:timizo wrote:We were made to believe that a wedding is the Godly (Christian) way to start a marriage. If that was true, it should be possible to either do it during the church service or immediately after With no drama, flowers and not a single cent spent. Today,the poor cannot afford a church wedding meaning that poverty now excludes you from starting a marriage in the Christian way. Today's Marriage is a pure show off or meant to affirm, prove a point or meet the expectations of friends. Its a celeb thing which we have adopted. Did you know that in the early Church, a wedding was not a church affair? Wedding as a church affair was introduced by the Catholic Church in 1563. Actually, church reformers wanted wedding excluded from church because they thought it was not a church affair. Did you know that most of the things we do today during the wedding ceremony including bridal party, rings were either started for reasons nothing to do with Christianity or borrowed from English Culture and nothing to do with Christianity? Interesting, as there is also no biblical character who did a wedding as we now know and take weddings to be. Had not looked at it like that. Anyway, I wonder why the premium put on traditional 'weddings' when it's 'marriage' that really matters and is under threat. There was the wedding at Cana where Jesus turned water into wine Just because Jesus attended does not mean it was conducted by church. Jesus attended many daily and cultural activities that had nothing to do with church / or religion. His visiting of fishermen and performing a miracle has not made every fishing expedition be presided over by a Pastor.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 10/4/2006 Posts: 13,821 Location: Nairobi
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timizo wrote:Shak wrote:Anti_Burglar wrote:timizo wrote:We were made to believe that a wedding is the Godly (Christian) way to start a marriage. If that was true, it should be possible to either do it during the church service or immediately after With no drama, flowers and not a single cent spent. Today,the poor cannot afford a church wedding meaning that poverty now excludes you from starting a marriage in the Christian way. Today's Marriage is a pure show off or meant to affirm, prove a point or meet the expectations of friends. Its a celeb thing which we have adopted. Did you know that in the early Church, a wedding was not a church affair? Wedding as a church affair was introduced by the Catholic Church in 1563. Actually, church reformers wanted wedding excluded from church because they thought it was not a church affair. Did you know that most of the things we do today during the wedding ceremony including bridal party, rings were either started for reasons nothing to do with Christianity or borrowed from English Culture and nothing to do with Christianity? Interesting, as there is also no biblical character who did a wedding as we now know and take weddings to be. Had not looked at it like that. Anyway, I wonder why the premium put on traditional 'weddings' when it's 'marriage' that really matters and is under threat. There was the wedding at Cana where Jesus turned water into wine Just because Jesus attended does not mean it was conducted by church. Jesus attended many daily and cultural activities that had nothing to do with church / or religion. His visiting of fishermen and performing a miracle has not made every fishing expedition be presided over by a Pastor. Weddings are cultural events. The parable of those tuGirls bila Mafuta gives us a hint on a Jewish wedding. Hata watu wangeona usiku!!! All Mushrooms are edible! Some Mushroom are only edible ONCE!
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