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Swenani
#1 Posted : Monday, January 18, 2016 10:45:51 AM
Rank: User


Joined: 8/15/2013
Posts: 13,237
Location: Vacuum
How much of your time do you spend with your kids-especially boys aged 5-10 years old? What do you consider to be a quality time spent?

Is tagging them on all your weekend errands(excluding eating fish and drinking), watching cartoons and playing play station together, taking them to friends birthdays and taking them out for games considered quality time?
If Obiero did it, Who Am I?
washiku
#2 Posted : Monday, January 18, 2016 12:00:25 PM
Rank: Chief


Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
"Strong fatherly involvement in their early life can also improve a child's future career prospects, the research shows"

http://www.telegraph.co....rs-have-a-higher-IQ.html
Swenani
#3 Posted : Monday, January 18, 2016 12:52:15 PM
Rank: User


Joined: 8/15/2013
Posts: 13,237
Location: Vacuum
[quote=washiku]"Strong fatherly involvement in their early life can also improve a child's future career prospects, the research shows"

http://www.telegraph.co....s-have-a-higher-IQ.html[/quote]


You haven't answered my question ama wewe bado watoto wako kwa njugu?
If Obiero did it, Who Am I?
subaru
#4 Posted : Monday, January 18, 2016 1:32:51 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 3/15/2010
Posts: 391
Location: nairobie
Swenani wrote:
How much of your time do you spend with your kids-especially boys aged 5-10 years old? What do you consider to be a quality time spent?

Is tagging them on all your weekend errands(excluding eating fish and drinking), watching cartoons and playing play station together, taking them to friends birthdays and taking them out for games considered quality time?


na kama wewe ni yule buda analetanga watoto kwa local hio tabia ukome
AlphDoti
#5 Posted : Monday, January 18, 2016 3:01:10 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 6/20/2008
Posts: 6,275
Location: Kenya
I understand your question bro.

The trick is to understand the age bracket of the kid and use appropriate approach. My strategy was:

1. Between 0 to 5 years, let the child be a child, guide and provide good environment to play and make safe mistakes.
2. Between 5 to 13 yrs i.e. to puberty, be strict and firm, give them a routine schedule, with objective of training them to be who you want them to be.
3. Between puberty from 13 yrs to end of teenage i.e. 19, be friendly, consult them, let the decisions look like it is theirs.
4. Above 19 i.e. after teenage, if you did a good job in 2 and 3 above, then you are successful
AlphDoti
#6 Posted : Monday, January 18, 2016 3:06:08 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 6/20/2008
Posts: 6,275
Location: Kenya
@swenani, this is a simple schedule that I developed and used on my kids when they were young. I shared with Wazuans before:

1- Mon to Fri: to school, on return shower, then small home chores assigned by my wife, then homework, then dinner and bed by 8:30pm

2- Sat & Sun: Madrasa in the mornings, returning home at 1:30, lunch, nap, snacking, then homework, until Asr prayers (for those who don't know, this is 4:30 Muslim prayers), then followed by playtime for 2hours. Play is around home, approx 1 km radius, or within the main Estate gate. This includes bike, skateboard, big toy cars & planes etc. They can choose to remain indoors and play if they choose. Curfew time is 6:30, shower then Maghrib prayers at around 6:45pm, then house chores, then dinner and sleep.

TV is very minimal to my kids (even myself, only news!!!)

So this will make them very occupied and no space for idle stuff (you know what I mean).

Now the grown one, has enrolled in football club near where we live, on Sat & Sun afternoon until 4:30pm. He's nurturing his talent there... I used to drop and pick him, but nowadays he's responsible, he just picks his rucksack bag and go.
Sevian
#7 Posted : Monday, January 18, 2016 3:09:08 PM
Rank: New-farer


Joined: 4/8/2015
Posts: 42
The objectives of parenting are to instill:
1. healthy self esteem: confidence in self, respect for others
2. Build a sense of personal competence (CAN DO attitude)
3. Personal integrity
4. Emotional intelligence (relational competence)
5. Godliness (spiritual orientation)

Many avenues are available for the above, but the primary source of the principles above is parents, esp fathers. And they are taught by action and words. Opportunities abound for lessons to be passed. So how much time do we need?
Swenani
#8 Posted : Monday, January 18, 2016 3:43:22 PM
Rank: User


Joined: 8/15/2013
Posts: 13,237
Location: Vacuum
AlphDoti wrote:
@swenani, this is a simple schedule that I developed and used on my kids when they were young. I shared with Wazuans before:

1- Mon to Fri: to school, on return shower, then small home chores assigned by my wife, then homework, then dinner and bed by 8:30pm

2- Sat & Sun: Madrasa in the mornings, returning home at 1:30, lunch, nap, snacking, then homework, until Asr prayers (for those who don't know, this is 4:30 Muslim prayers), then followed by playtime for 2hours. Play is around home, approx 1 km radius, or within the main Estate gate. This includes bike, skateboard, big toy cars & planes etc. They can choose to remain indoors and play if they choose. Curfew time is 6:30, shower then Maghrib prayers at around 6:45pm, then house chores, then dinner and sleep.

TV is very minimal to my kids (even myself, only news!!!)

So this will make them very occupied and no space for idle stuff (you know what I mean).

Now the grown one, has enrolled in football club near where we live, on Sat & Sun afternoon until 4:30pm. He's nurturing his talent there... I used to drop and pick him, but nowadays he's responsible, he just picks his rucksack bag and go.



How much time do you spend time with them, it seems they are either at Madrassa,playing or carrying house chores. When do you spend time with them?
If Obiero did it, Who Am I?
AlphDoti
#9 Posted : Monday, January 18, 2016 4:45:25 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 6/20/2008
Posts: 6,275
Location: Kenya
Swenani wrote:
AlphDoti wrote:
@swenani, this is a simple schedule that I developed and used on my kids when they were young. I shared with Wazuans before:

1- Mon to Fri: to school, on return shower, then small home chores assigned by my wife, then homework, then dinner and bed by 8:30pm

2- Sat & Sun: Madrasa in the mornings, returning home at 1:30, lunch, nap, snacking, then homework, until Asr prayers (for those who don't know, this is 4:30 Muslim prayers), then followed by playtime for 2hours. Play is around home, approx 1 km radius, or within the main Estate gate. This includes bike, skateboard, big toy cars & planes etc. They can choose to remain indoors and play if they choose. Curfew time is 6:30, shower then Maghrib prayers at around 6:45pm, then house chores, then dinner and sleep.

TV is very minimal to my kids (even myself, only news!!!)

So this will make them very occupied and no space for idle stuff (you know what I mean).

Now the grown one, has enrolled in football club near where we live, on Sat & Sun afternoon until 4:30pm. He's nurturing his talent there... I used to drop and pick him, but nowadays he's responsible, he just picks his rucksack bag and go.

How much time do you spend time with them, it seems they are either at Madrassa,playing or carrying house chores. When do you spend time with them?

Everyday: 30 mins in the morning, 2 hrs in evening. Total Mon to Fri 12.5hrs.

Saturday & Sunday: morning 30 mins, noon 30 mins, afternoon, 30 mins, evening 2 hrs. Once a month, I take them on trip to visit one or two mosques, where we spend whole weekend out, 24hrs/day. This way, I can practice with them full Islamic lifestyle within 24 hrs. Total: normal weekend 7hrs or outing weekend 48hrs.
washiku
#10 Posted : Monday, January 18, 2016 4:56:31 PM
Rank: Chief


Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
AlphDoti wrote:
Swenani wrote:
AlphDoti wrote:
@swenani, this is a simple schedule that I developed and used on my kids when they were young. I shared with Wazuans before:

1- Mon to Fri: to school, on return shower, then small home chores assigned by my wife, then homework, then dinner and bed by 8:30pm

2- Sat & Sun: Madrasa in the mornings, returning home at 1:30, lunch, nap, snacking, then homework, until Asr prayers (for those who don't know, this is 4:30 Muslim prayers), then followed by playtime for 2hours. Play is around home, approx 1 km radius, or within the main Estate gate. This includes bike, skateboard, big toy cars & planes etc. They can choose to remain indoors and play if they choose. Curfew time is 6:30, shower then Maghrib prayers at around 6:45pm, then house chores, then dinner and sleep.

TV is very minimal to my kids (even myself, only news!!!)

So this will make them very occupied and no space for idle stuff (you know what I mean).

Now the grown one, has enrolled in football club near where we live, on Sat & Sun afternoon until 4:30pm. He's nurturing his talent there... I used to drop and pick him, but nowadays he's responsible, he just picks his rucksack bag and go.



How much time do you spend time with them, it seems they are either at Madrassa,playing or carrying house chores. When do you spend time with them?

@fishmonger, it is right there in my post. I think you didn't read it properly Sad


Hi DhotiMan...How have you been?
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