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Rank: New-farer Joined: 7/19/2013 Posts: 88
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Wazuans, things are thick! Been married for 4.5 years with two kids, 4yr and 9mo old. I have for sometime suspected my beta now worse half of mischief. She is a bit secretive with her phone. But i have been patient. I had the opportunity of landing on her first, but we didn't move in together until when she got paged. To the real meat now, on my house laptop i installed a key logger because she loves being online. Sasa jana night siku 40 fikad(She is away for a visit) I decided to review reports of last month on the key logger randomly and what i found shocked me. Am really regretting and not sure our marriage will survive this. She was landed on by her X(she had convinced me i was the only one who had ever had the opportunity) plus procured an abortion while in campo from the same X, think just before she came to me. Am angry, feel betrayed, used, useless, too mad,blackmailed, till i shed tears. This was jana 10pm. Haven't been able to sleep, my eyes are red  I really love my kids(thinking DNA now), n my love for her was growing(married because i had scored) My issues are a. How do i confront her? i fear ill kill someone when she returns b. How do i trust her? c. They have been chatting lately with the X who is married. Reviewed the chats also, but were just general stories. The X is a church guy, and with actions of pastors lately...wacha tu. c. What are my options, i cant get over this.... “I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. That is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.”
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/26/2012 Posts: 15,980
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Print all the conversations, do that DNA test secretly after u get the results just sign the papers. You will get over her and get another one who will be loyal and truthful. Once trust is broken its hard to recover and believe me that can lead u to insanity. Be calm at the moment. Most of us marry to please society. Ignore it "There are only two emotions in the market, hope & fear. The problem is you hope when you should fear & fear when you should hope: - Jesse Livermore
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Rank: Elder Joined: 7/11/2012 Posts: 5,222
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The devil hates marriages. His mission simple Kill, Steal, Destroy! Its not hard to deduce what master some people serve... for a tree is known by its fruit. Take time out. Pray. Talk to a mentor. Talk to your parents. Talk to someone older and wiser. Take your kids somewhere, parents etc while you think this through. Whatever you do, DON'T ACT IN HASTE. Act when you are sure its a decision you'll be able to live with for the rest of your life. They were ready to kill, until Jesus said 'Let ye without sin cast the first stone...'
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/26/2012 Posts: 15,980
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Usidanganywe na hawa mapastor. Even the bible allows for divorce once a partner has been found to be adulterous. This is your life boss. God gave you the natural instincts to suspect and the brains to know how you will go about in knowing the truth. So, its upto u to act or wait for big disease to "catch u" "There are only two emotions in the market, hope & fear. The problem is you hope when you should fear & fear when you should hope: - Jesse Livermore
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Rank: Elder Joined: 7/11/2012 Posts: 5,222
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Adultery occurred BEFORE marriage. Do your DNA Usidaganywe na shetani, prince of lies.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 1/7/2010 Posts: 1,279 Location: nbi
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Whatever else, no need to kill her since that will destroy the kids' lives. There are many ways for payback. mathukuma has mentioned one, wewe pia kula perhaps even one of her friends/sister/cousin/mother-in-law. Ama kula wote. Revenge is a dish best-served cold. The Governor of Nyeri - 2017
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 4/1/2009 Posts: 1,884
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have not seen anything about her currently cheating on you. you're overreacting. so she had sex before she met you. so she procured an abortion before she met you. what should matter is how she's behaved since you were together not how she was before. if what women do with their life before they are ready to be married should determine whether they're married or not then all of my female college classmates would never have been married. so you're overreacting and a bit naive.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/17/2008 Posts: 23,365 Location: Nairobi
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commando wrote:Wazuans, things are thick! Been married for 4.5 years with two kids, 4yr and 9mo old. I have for sometime suspected my beta now worse half of mischief. She is a bit secretive with her phone. But i have been patient. I had the opportunity of landing on her first, but we didn't move in together until when she got paged. To the real meat now, on my house laptop i installed a key logger because she loves being online. Sasa jana night siku 40 fikad(She is away for a visit) I decided to review reports of last month on the key logger randomly and what i found shocked me. Am really regretting and not sure our marriage will survive this. She was landed on by her X(she had convinced me i was the only one who had ever had the opportunity) plus procured an abortion while in campo from the same X, think just before she came to me. Am angry, feel betrayed, used, useless, too mad,blackmailed, till i shed tears. This was jana 10pm. Haven't been able to sleep, my eyes are red I really love my kids(thinking DNA now), n my love for her was growing(married because i had scored) My issues are a. How do i confront her? i fear ill kill someone when she returns b. How do i trust her? c. They have been chatting lately with the X who is married. Reviewed the chats also, but were just general stories. The X is a church guy, and with actions of pastors lately...wacha tu. c. What are my options, i cant get over this.... All the highlighted above happenned before you two got married right? Were you a virgin when you met her. If she has not cheated on you since you got married then I see no problem, talk to her about the past and forget about option 'a'!!! ..."Wewe ni mtu mdogo sana....na mwenye amekuandika pia ni mtu mdogo sana!".
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Rank: New-farer Joined: 7/19/2013 Posts: 88
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mkenyan wrote:have not seen anything about her currently cheating on you. you're overreacting. so she had sex before she met you. so she procured an abortion before she met you. what should matter is how she's behaved since you were together not how she was before. if what women do with their life before they are ready to be married should determine whether they're married or not then all of my female college classmates would never have been married. so you're overreacting and a bit naive. mkenyan, because she lied abt her past, because she still maintains contact with her X, kwanza its her who looked for the X on FB. n for like 4 days consecutively they were chatting really hard. She said she didnt have her number, discoverd she does but its not saved under any name. They also chat on whatapp “I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. That is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.”
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 12/17/2010 Posts: 1,163 Location: Sudan
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@ Commando. Pole Sana for the discovery. My advice comes thus One, be calm for now, don't let emotions run over you. Two, get to know really that she still has a thing with the X. I say this coz, as a man I know you had a r/ship before marrying her, chatting with an X does not necessarily mean they are back to basics again. Three, I know the trust is broken, esp now that you know you weren't the first to land on her. But the quiz is, Will you get one Virgin one this time. To me your page with her began the day you met, what happened before then may be ignored as at now, coz am sure everyone has skeletons. Confront her with the facts you discovered, see her reaction, she may open up and tell you her past...marriage has a lot of compromises my brother. "Peace is our profession, War is our business" ...Unknown
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 12/17/2010 Posts: 1,163 Location: Sudan
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commando wrote:mkenyan wrote:have not seen anything about her currently cheating on you. you're overreacting. so she had sex before she met you. so she procured an abortion before she met you. what should matter is how she's behaved since you were together not how she was before. if what women do with their life before they are ready to be married should determine whether they're married or not then all of my female college classmates would never have been married. so you're overreacting and a bit naive. mkenyan, because she lied abt her past, because she still maintains contact with her X, kwanza its her who looked for the X on FB. n for like 4 days consecutively they were chatting really hard. She said she didnt have her number, discoverd she does but its not saved under any name. They also chat on whatapp I agree with Mkenyan, Lets be real. If she has not cheated on you since you got married, do not overreact. About lying abt her past, wewe niambie kama she knows ALL the girlfriends you had before you met her? You laso lied, we all lie at some point. Even having looked for the X on FB to me is not a sin. Marriage really changes people's perspective...she is a different girl from the one who was in campus. Concentrate on your current life, the past will kill you for nothing. "Peace is our profession, War is our business" ...Unknown
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Rank: Member Joined: 9/30/2013 Posts: 254
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i really do not understand why when an X,landed in your airport is like he has control,anytime you meet even when married and he wants to land you find yourself allowing it,once you land ,you are in control,married or not
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Rank: New-farer Joined: 7/19/2013 Posts: 88
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Um Sayala wrote:@ Commando.
Pole Sana for the discovery. My advice comes thus
One, be calm for now, don't let emotions run over you. Two, get to know really that she still has a thing with the X. I say this coz, as a man I know you had a r/ship before marrying her, chatting with an X does not necessarily mean they are back to basics again.
Three, I know the trust is broken, esp now that you know you weren't the first to land on her. But the quiz is, Will you get one Virgin one this time. To me your page with her began the day you met, what happened before then may be ignored as at now, coz am sure everyone has skeletons.
Confront her with the facts you discovered, see her reaction, she may open up and tell you her past...marriage has a lot of compromises my brother. Am calm, really trying! But i don't know what else she has hidden from me! “I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. That is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.”
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/26/2012 Posts: 15,980
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The whole relationship is based on lies. How much more is behind the cobwebs. It will take alot of energy and time to rebuild that trust but all the best. "There are only two emotions in the market, hope & fear. The problem is you hope when you should fear & fear when you should hope: - Jesse Livermore
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Rank: Member Joined: 1/27/2012 Posts: 851 Location: Nairobi
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commando wrote:Wazuans, things are thick! Been married for 4.5 years with two kids, 4yr and 9mo old. I have for sometime suspected my beta now worse half of mischief. She is a bit secretive with her phone. But i have been patient. I had the opportunity of landing on her first, but we didn't move in together until when she got paged. To the real meat now, on my house laptop i installed a key logger because she loves being online. Sasa jana night siku 40 fikad(She is away for a visit) I decided to review reports of last month on the key logger randomly and what i found shocked me. Am really regretting and not sure our marriage will survive this. She was landed on by her X(she had convinced me i was the only one who had ever had the opportunity) plus procured an abortion while in campo from the same X, think just before she came to me. Am angry, feel betrayed, used, useless, too mad,blackmailed, till i shed tears. This was jana 10pm. Haven't been able to sleep, my eyes are red I really love my kids(thinking DNA now), n my love for her was growing(married because i had scored) My issues are a. How do i confront her? i fear ill kill someone when she returns b. How do i trust her? c. They have been chatting lately with the X who is married. Reviewed the chats also, but were just general stories. The X is a church guy, and with actions of pastors lately...wacha tu. c. What are my options, i cant get over this.... Kiyana! Mboss! Dude! Quail! Whatever you are, RELAX! Your wife chatting with her ex shouldn't elicit the sort of reaction you are portraying here. Not everyone is happy about their past and not everyone will be willing to tell it truthfully. That doesn't mean they don't love you or betraying you. It also depends on how their relationship ended with the ex. Some can be talked to, others not. Stop being paranoid. The reason why you are reacting this way,is coz you didn't trust her in the first place hence installing that keylogger. I think you are trying to justify your action and suspicion. I don't think you got much on her,especially on currently[after marriage] cheating on you. DNA? Do it just to be sure,could be the ex did plant!
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Rank: New-farer Joined: 7/19/2013 Posts: 88
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Um Sayala wrote:commando wrote:mkenyan wrote:have not seen anything about her currently cheating on you. you're overreacting. so she had sex before she met you. so she procured an abortion before she met you. what should matter is how she's behaved since you were together not how she was before. if what women do with their life before they are ready to be married should determine whether they're married or not then all of my female college classmates would never have been married. so you're overreacting and a bit naive. mkenyan, because she lied abt her past, because she still maintains contact with her X, kwanza its her who looked for the X on FB. n for like 4 days consecutively they were chatting really hard. She said she didnt have her number, discoverd she does but its not saved under any name. They also chat on whatapp I agree with Mkenyan, Lets be real. If she has not cheated on you since you got married, do not overreact. About lying abt her past, wewe niambie kama she knows ALL the girlfriends you had before you met her? You laso lied, we all lie at some point. Even having looked for the X on FB to me is not a sin. Marriage really changes people's perspective...she is a different girl from the one who was in campus. Concentrate on your current life, the past will kill you for nothing. Unfortunately, her past has been laid bare. I have a past which she knows, like 80%. But she lectures me on morals, and portrays herself as faultless, mweupe kama pamba,an angel, now this! “I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. That is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.”
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
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Rank: New-farer Joined: 7/19/2013 Posts: 88
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My biggest issue is she lied to me, big time. I will remember this “I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. That is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.”
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/17/2008 Posts: 23,365 Location: Nairobi
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commando wrote:My biggest issue is she lied to me, big time. I will remember this How did you just believe that you were the 1st.....you didn't know how to tell? #Justasking!!!! ..."Wewe ni mtu mdogo sana....na mwenye amekuandika pia ni mtu mdogo sana!".
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Rank: New-farer Joined: 7/19/2013 Posts: 88
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McReggae wrote:commando wrote:My biggest issue is she lied to me, big time. I will remember this How did you just believe that you were the 1st.....you didn't know how to tell? #Justasking!!!! I was the first, don't think she was stitched, but think what happened after that ndio elephant. “I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. That is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.”
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 1/7/2010 Posts: 1,279 Location: nbi
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Ngeff, ngeff. We kwenda kula watu The Governor of Nyeri - 2017
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