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Involve Your Spouse In financial Decision Making
young
#1 Posted : Monday, December 10, 2012 1:27:14 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 6/20/2007
Posts: 2,037
Location: Lagos, Nigeria
Getting your spouse involved in the management of family finances may be tough for some individuals, but this has its own benefits.

Marriage counsellors say it is important to carry your spouse along when making financial decisions in a family. In our article last week on ‘Involving family members in saving money,’ it was stated that your ability to save is vital, but involving your family in the process is more beneficial. According to experts, financial security in a family doesn’t come easy, but requires adequate planning and strict adherence to saving. This, however, can only be meticulously achieved when you involve your spouse in the management of your family finances.

Experts say in most situations, there is an individual in the family who likes doing all that pertains to numbers and payments. This fellow pays the bills, manages the spending or cash flow, looks for great deals and works on spreadsheets, leaving his or her spouse out of the activities. But experts note that even though this individual is doing all of these things, there is still another money manager in the family. “No one person can do all the money arithmetic in a home, you have to involve your spouse and you will be surprised at his or her input,” says a marriage counsellor, Mrs. Anozie Love.

She notes that your spouse might not be as involved in the day to day management of your family’s finances, and explains that this is because in many cases your spouse doesn’t have knowledge of how much money is in the family’s bank account. Experts note that most times, the spouse just knows how much he or she can spend on entertainment or clothes for the month and maybe a few other budget categories at his or her disposal.

According to experts, this is a dangerous approach to family finances. “No one knows what might happen to the Chief Finance Officer of the family and if something costly happens to him or her, what will the spouse do?” Anozie asks. She further asks how would the spouse step in and manage everything if something drastic happens to the CFO? Experts therefore say it is important for both spouses to manage their resources as this has great benefits. Below are simple steps on how you can involve your spouse in financial decision making, according to experts:

Budget together monthly

This is a very important in a home, experts say. They note that spouses should budget their money together each month as this will boost their savings and will trim unnecessary expenses when shrewdly done. Even though you have fixed spending in place, there are still planning decisions to be made each month for discretionary spending, marriage counsellors say. One thing you must understand is that your spouse doesn’t have to be necessarily involved in the day to day finances at the level of detail as you may have, but should have knowledge of the resources and how they’re being used. When this is done, he or she will appreciate it if undertaken for mutually gainful reasons.

Review expenses together occasionally

According to experts, it is also important you review expenses incurred by the family occasionally. This could be on a weekly or biweekly basis. Professionals say while the monthly meeting is important, so is a weekly meeting about money. They note that all that this requires is a review of spending for the major budget categories and a discussion around new significant expenses needed for the month. It could be seen as a status meeting for both spouses. You may not know how much you are saving for your family by doing this until your spouse is not around. If you want to take it to the next step, you can write down the balances of the major budget categories for your spouse so he or she knows the overall state of the spending plan. “This also has a way of unifying the family, especially the couples,” Anozie adds.

Switch bill-paying duties

Let your spouse pay some of the bills. If your spouse usually is not the one who pays the bill, allow him or her give it a try for some time, but be willing to offer help if necessary. Experts say this will give your spouse a better understanding and appreciation of how important it is to be involved in the decision making process of your family’s finances. Allow your spouse to pay some of the monthly bills, but don’t overload the person who doesn’t normally do this work for the family. You may give him or her a few key bills to manage, as this is a great way to involve the person and for your spouse to feel fulfilled being a good financial steward that contributes to the family.

Solve the maths together

This should not be left to one person. Engage your spouse in the maths. Allow him or her to try and calculate how the family would thrive on a limited sum for a week or month. If your spouse still can’t see the importance of his or her participation in the financial decision making, sit down together and look at your budget or create a budget if there is none. When the numbers are right there in front of your eyes, it’s easier to be involved in the family finances. He or she will be forced to make inputs, provided you are both in good terms at the time of working on the family budget.

The wazua spirit as members is to educate and inform and learn from others within the limit of what we know in any chosen area irrespective of our differences in tribes, nationalities, etc. .
Sufficiently Philanga....thropic
#2 Posted : Monday, December 10, 2012 3:50:08 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 9/23/2010
Posts: 2,220
Location: Sundowner,Amboseli
Good one mzee Young. Care to give us the link.
Just thinking the title should have been.....'involve your wife in financial decision making' but then again im told we are in the 21st century!
@SufficientlyP
jerry
#3 Posted : Monday, December 10, 2012 4:06:51 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 9/29/2006
Posts: 2,570
Sufficiently Philanga....thropic wrote:
Good one mzee Young. Care to give us the link.
Just thinking the title should have been.....'involve your wife in financial decision making' but then again im told we are in the 21st century!

Your thinking is right since if you confess the Bible the man is always the head.
The opposite of courage is not cowardice, it's conformity.
King G
#4 Posted : Monday, December 10, 2012 7:19:54 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 6/20/2012
Posts: 3,855
Location: Othumo
jerry wrote:
Sufficiently Philanga....thropic wrote:
Good one mzee Young. Care to give us the link.
Just thinking the title should have been.....'involve your wife in financial decision making' but then again im told we are in the 21st century!

Your thinking is right since if you confess the Bible the man is always the head.


Male chauvinism - spouse it is!
Thieves
mawinder
#5 Posted : Monday, December 10, 2012 10:10:23 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 4/30/2008
Posts: 6,029
My friend has 2 wives.How should he go about this?
dunkang
#6 Posted : Monday, December 10, 2012 10:23:20 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 6/2/2011
Posts: 4,818
Location: -1.2107, 36.8831
Even if bibi is from kabete?
Receive with simplicity everything that happens to you.” ― Rashi

Pesa Nane
#7 Posted : Monday, December 10, 2012 11:08:39 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 5/25/2012
Posts: 4,105
Location: 08c
mawinder wrote:
My friend has 2 wives.How should he go about this?

Depends on corporate arrangement ie home branch vs upcountry branch, Centralized HQ vs Independent Branches, affiliate vs subsidiary, merger vs takeover etc Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly
Pesa Nane plans to be shilingi when he grows up.
jerry
#8 Posted : Monday, December 10, 2012 11:22:27 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 9/29/2006
Posts: 2,570
King G wrote:
jerry wrote:
Sufficiently Philanga....thropic wrote:
Good one mzee Young. Care to give us the link.
Just thinking the title should have been.....'involve your wife in financial decision making' but then again im told we are in the 21st century!

Your thinking is right since if you confess the Bible the man is always the head.


Male chauvinism - spouse it is!

Even if a man has 2 wives we still think of spouse? May be just a soft way of putting it.
The opposite of courage is not cowardice, it's conformity.
mawinder
#9 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 1:56:31 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 4/30/2008
Posts: 6,029
dunkang wrote:
Even if bibi is from kabete?

dare try and you will soon be in heaven.young should know that most landladies in kangemi are widows and come from kiambu county.whether by design or coincidence your guess is as good as mine.
Ngong
#10 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 11:20:04 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/17/2012
Posts: 1,461
Location: Ngong Forest
mawinder wrote:
dunkang wrote:
Even if bibi is from kabete?

dare try and you will soon be in heaven.young should know that most landladies in kangemi are widows and come from kiambu county.whether by design or coincidence your guess is as good as mine.


Wacha the guess! what do u mean? they kill their men or frustrate them to early death?
sizzla
#11 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 11:26:48 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 6/10/2006
Posts: 201
Location: Nairobi
Not applicable...
S.Mutaga III
#12 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 11:36:46 AM
Rank: Member


Joined: 3/26/2012
Posts: 830
Young...nice advice...but not applicable...you must be new in town.
A successful man is not he who gets the best, it is he who makes the best from what he gets.
jguru
#13 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 1:32:53 PM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 10/25/2007
Posts: 1,574
Ngong wrote:
mawinder wrote:
dunkang wrote:
Even if bibi is from kabete?

dare try and you will soon be in heaven.young should know that most landladies in kangemi are widows and come from kiambu county.whether by design or coincidence your guess is as good as mine.


Wacha the guess! what do u mean? they kill their men or frustrate them to early death?


Just after he has finished painting his newly built flats and they are ready for occupation, he encounters some "robbers" at the gate to his house as he waits for it to be opened. Ask around Uthiru/Kinoo/Kikuyu/Limuru. That's how most men with Kabete wives end up in heaven.
Set out to correct the world's wrongs and you will most certainly wind up adding to them.
2012
#14 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 2:41:37 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 12/9/2009
Posts: 6,592
Location: Nairobi
jguru wrote:
That's how most men with Kabete wives end up in heaven.


Death is not an option. @jguru next time marry someone you trust that way even God will increase you together.

Going with your theory, what would compel this woman who has vowed to spend the rest of her life with you even in bad times to off you? I can assure you that it's not the new found wealth. After all who will see enjoy it with? Those men are killed because of their mipangos unless you want to tell me all those developments you see in Kiambu are owned by widows.

BBI will solve it
:)
CaptainGG
#15 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 2:53:25 PM
Rank: New-farer


Joined: 10/13/2011
Posts: 67
Location: Kenya
S.Mutaga III wrote:
Young...nice advice...but not applicable...you must be new in town.



@Young, are you married?

Marriages are complex and many hold on because of children. This thing works in some marriages lakini in many cases, you even regret why you involved the other partner. Everything has its advantages and disadvatages but I think the old practice where men owned property was much better.
tuvok
#16 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 3:39:01 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 5/2/2007
Posts: 536
+1 on @Young's advice. I am married. I always go out of my way to ensure that our finances are transparent. Note that I said *our*.

Wife and I decided that long ago. It's part of trusting each other.
mawinder
#17 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 4:25:29 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 4/30/2008
Posts: 6,029
2012 wrote:
jguru wrote:
That's how most men with Kabete wives end up in heaven.


Death is not an option. @jguru next time marry someone you trust that way even God will increase you together.

Going with your theory, what would compel this woman who has vowed to spend the rest of her life with you even in bad times to off you? I can assure you that it's not the new found wealth. After all who will see enjoy it with? Those men are killed because of their mipangos unless you want to tell me all those developments you see in Kiambu are owned by widows.

Most of them are owned by widows and the men are killed after fathering at least a kid and acquiring wealth,not because of mpango wa kando.
mawinder
#18 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 4:27:01 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 4/30/2008
Posts: 6,029
tuvok wrote:
+1 on @Young's advice. I am married. I always go out of my way to ensure that our finances are transparent. Note that I said *our*.

Wife and I decided that long ago. It's part of trusting each other.

If she is from Kiambu be careful.
FRM2011
#19 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 6:16:20 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 11/5/2010
Posts: 2,459
Am happy to note the balance of power in most wazua households is still intact in a way that would make our grandfathers proud.
S.Mutaga III
#20 Posted : Tuesday, December 11, 2012 7:49:33 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 3/26/2012
Posts: 830
tuvok wrote:
+1 on @Young's advice. I am married. I always go out of my way to ensure that our finances are transparent. Note that I said *our*.

Wife and I decided that long ago. It's part of trusting each other.

i may be young (21)but I wont see a wazuan fail where I could have advised...I have elder sisters who I overhear saying "pesa zake ni zetu na zangu ni zangu"...their husbands think financial matters are transparent...just open one bank a/c with another bank and start depositing some cash regularly...and thank me later.
A successful man is not he who gets the best, it is he who makes the best from what he gets.
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