vinii wrote:let her be .... you start this panel beating business halafu achanuke .. utashangaa mbloo
I tend to agree with @vinii. Love her and respect the way she is.
But if you must, then 'panel beat' her in respectful way. But be careful, there is an hadith that compares women to a 'crooked rib'.
#273. Abu Hurayra reported that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "Treat women well. The woman was created from a rib. The most bent part of the rib is the top part. If you try to straighten it, you will break it. If you leave it, it remains bent. So treat women well."The prophet said that one looks at four things in a woman (or a man), they plan to marry:
(i). Virtue (her religion or religiousness)
(ii). Noble (her family status)
(iii). Wealth (her wealth)
(iv). Beauty (her beauty)
So, you should have done your background checks properly. You should marry the pious woman, who is has obedience to creator. Otherwise you will be a loser in your panel beating "mission".