Dear All
A few minutes ago I have been talking to a colleague in connection with the Nairobi city council by-laws.
This morning he was arrested within city centre for the offence of crossing the road while on the phone. He was marched to a city council vehicle that was parked nearby. He was held for three hours without being taken court.
Eventually he negotiated for a bribe of 2k and was released.

During our conversation, in ten seconds he had mentioned a thousand words, I was harassed, molested, detained, embarrassed, degraded, interfered with my human rights, and wasted my time to report work, name them. Very interesting.

Please be informed of some new rules and regulation in place currently being enforced by city council askaris and fines against.
Kindly avoid

• Buying from hawkers within city streets- Fine of -5000/=
• Sitting on a flower pot in the CBD-5000/=
• Spitting on any footpath or blowing the nose aimlessly other than into a suitable cloth or tissue-10,000/=
• Taking or alighting from a matatu from a non-designated area-10,000-15,000/=
• Crossing the road while you are on the phone-2000/=
• Making any kind of noise on the streets-10,000/= (when growing up, talking in class was noise.... what constitutes noise here? I havent met anyone screaming in the streets....)
• Playing any game, riding or driving or propelling on a foot path-5000/=
• Loitering-10,000/= (how will they determine this or is it if they see you several times in same street?)
• Having your car with a 'FOR SALE' sign and haven't paid the council is also punishable-20,000/= (Damn! i was gonna do this! Ok... where and how much am i supposed to pay for this?)
• Pedestrians crossing the roads in Nairobi when traffic light is red -10,000/=
• Motorist moving on when the traffic light is red -10,000/=
• Unfastened seat belt both in psv and private- 500/=
• Use of mobile phone when driving Kshs-10,000/=
• Driving with worn out tyres - 10,000/=
• Double parking - 20,000/=

Observe your personal security and live happy person unless you philanthropic enough to finance the council. Remember that in law ignorance does not afford an excuse.

Please take note of the proceedings and if possible share with your loved ones na wajipange

@Wendz thanks. On the mobile phone one I usually find it humorous when people complain a lot when nabbed or charged with that offense yet the City Council had shouted about it when I think it was passed.

Now the one for crossing the road when lights are red I would probably be nabbed on one of these days. I tried it for like a couple of days and stopped when I realised that I was in all the cases the only one left standing at a red light with no oncoming vehicles and everyone but me crossing.

Which are these areas, generally?

Where you find them collecting parking fee

And what is the fine for not stopping if I realize a shitty kanjo people is about to make me 10,000/= to 20,000/= poorer?

And what are they doing duplicating Traffic police roles. I know it is a desperate way to raise funds but aren't they encroaching onto Kenya Police territory? What is the police commish doing? Or he has accepted the "help" from Philip Kasia?

By the way a friend of mine had her brother arrested yesterday for stepping on a flower pot or something like that. They gave him a tour of the city until the uncle tracked them down. They lied to him that if the "kijana akipelekwa ndani" he will be fined 50,000/=. "Na hawezi pelekwa kortini leo. Labda Kesho ama Friday". The now scared uncle parted with 25,000/= for his release. When I told the sister 1k or 2k would have done the trick (if you MUST bribe), she couldn't believe!