C&P
if you thought there's no humor from western,picture this:

Omwami bought a new mobile.
He sent a message to everyone from his Phone Book & said,
'My Mobile No. Has changed. Earlier it was Nokia 3310. Now it is 6610'

============ ========= ========= ======
Omwami: I am Proud, coz my son is in Medical College .
Friend: Really, what is he studying.
Omwami: No, he is not studying, they are Studying him.
============ ========= ========= ========= ===
Omwami: Doctor, in my dreams, I play football every night.
DR: Take this tablet, you will be ok.
Omwami : Can I take it tomorrow, tonight is the final game.
============ ========= ========= ========= ====
Omwami : If I die, will u remarry?
Wife: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will u remarry?
Omwami : No, I'll also stay with your sister.
============ ========= ========= ========= ==
Omwami : People consider me as a 'GOD'
Wife: How do you know??
Omwami : When I went to the Park today, everybody said, Oh GOD! U have come again..
============ ========= ========= ========= ====
Omwami complained to the police: 'Sir, all items are missing, except the TV in my house.'
Police: 'How come the thief did not take TV?'
Omwami : 'I was watching TV news...'
============ ========= ========= ========= ==
Omwami comes back 2 his car & find a note saying 'Parking Fine'
He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole 'Thanks for the compliment.'
============ ========= ========= ========= ======
How do you recognize Omwami in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases the board.
============ ========= ========= ========= ========
Once Omwami was walking he had a glove on one hand and not on other.
So the man asked him why he did so. He replied that the weather forecast announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would be hot.
============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ===
Omwami in a bar and his cellular phone rings. He picks it up and
Says 'Hello, how did you know I was here?'
============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ===
Omwami : Why are all these people running?
Man - This is a race, the winner will get the cup

Omwami - If only the winner will get the cup, why are others running?

============ ========= ========= ========= ========= ===
Teacher: 'I killed a person' convert this sentence into future tense
Omwami : The future tense is 'u will go to jail'
============ ========= ========= ========= ========= =====
Omwami told his servant: 'Go and water the plants!'
Servant: 'It's already raining.'

Omwami: 'So what? Take an umbrella and go.'



By Gairey Omosh

UJINGA NI:1. kujiita romantic na uko single. 2. kukaa mbele kwa mat alafu unaturn kuambia konda 'shukisha' na umekaa na dere. 3. kutumia cursor kuscare mosquito kutoka kwa screen ya comp. 4. kureduce volume ya radio ili usome sms. 5. kuruka line ya V.C.T. 6. kukojoa kando ya barabara kisha unatema mate. 7. kuscratch bamba 5 na coin ya mbao....8. nyama kuungua jikoni kama bado unasoma gazeti ambayo ilifungiwa hiyo nyama!

Click on the link below and try to click on that guy's nose!!!!

http://www.selfcontrolfreak.com/slaan.html