Very interesting discussion. My question is how do people outside of the relationship know that one spouse is doing better? Does the lady of the house disclose to all and sundry or is it a result of her standing or position at the workplace viz a vis her hubby?
My take on this is we need to shed our parents' mentality. Your wife should be your soul mate,not just the mother of your children. If she wants to go back to school, i will support her 100%.Like someone previously said, why did you get married in the first place? Was it for better or for worse or so that you can "hide some cards" under the table?
Your financial goals as partners should be aligned like the stars in the sky. What are your goals say five years from now? Should we buy this plot so that we can eventually develop it or should i just buy it and keep mum on ownership? Is this our money or my money? Till people shed this habit of being secretive with their money, we will always have problems. Take the case of many prominent people who have died interstate and the existing spouse has no clue where the funds are located? Who will eventually benefit? Some rich swiss banker?
I also agree with those who say that tensions might arise when the woman begins to boss the man around.
I believe most of the issues raised above are shaped by our culture and specifically by how we viewed our parents growing up.
It's not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.