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Single Women with kids
gogeta
#31 Posted : Monday, July 06, 2009 11:24:00 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 10/17/2008
Posts: 338
Location: Kenya
leTs Be realisTic heRe...meN and WomeN,due To tHeir naturaL curiOsiTy deciDe tO do it or maY be foR onE reasoN or ThE othEr a mistaKe resulTs to a BabY..theN lateR theSe two realiSe thaT theY jusT canT make iT,so theY parT waYs and thE lady is LefT to brinG uP the Kid...iF anothEr duDe falLs in Love wiTh the LaDy woulD the kiD be tHe firSt decisioN To consideR reallY..bearinG in MinD thaT thE kiD will leave tHe two in lateR yeaRs...i donT thiNk so.




Wisdom brightens a man's face and changes its hard appearance.Eccle 8:1
Think the unthinkable but wear a dark suit
karuss
#32 Posted : Monday, July 06, 2009 11:44:00 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 7/6/2009
Posts: 40
@Njung'e ...yeah..how many dudes can actually stand up for counting????good to challenge the brothers...

@Gogeta...yeah i also think it happens like that sometimes...out of curiosity..a baby shows up..then the couple discovers yenyewe..we r just not meant foe each other...wot to do?the jamaa will easily move on...how bout the chic?should she be denied the opportunity to be in a really happy rship with a jamaa even wit a guy who hasn't fathered before?really?really?


WIN WIN SITUATION
nanfor
#33 Posted : Monday, July 06, 2009 11:52:00 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 3/6/2009
Posts: 172
the topic and some of the answers belong to 1971.....Ladies,if you find a man who cannot look at your kids without thinking of the other guy,or asking for a dna test,that is as insecure a man as you will ever find.....Bure kabisa and he's probably dogging you and the guilt is killing him......Every case is different and men forget that after having a child,the woman is more worried about the 'ka-man' than the other way round......I know of ladies who use this scenario to weed out the useless,insecure men who are looking for TRS's 'virgin land to plough'...haha
Mr.Tea
#34 Posted : Monday, July 06, 2009 12:18:00 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 12/4/2008
Posts: 341
Location: Nairobi
My take on this one is simple.Should you find yourself in a situation whereby the object of your affection is a single parent and you are having a struggle whether to marry them or not,then you probably do not deserve her. Do you have a clue how much garbage they've heard to deal with thus far? Besides...this is confirmation enough that you are not ready for a responsibility..a key component in marriage.

Patience Pays in Guaranteed Checks
Patience Pays In Guaranteed Checks.
ngwono
#35 Posted : Monday, July 06, 2009 12:23:00 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 8/8/2008
Posts: 201
A good topic.My opinion no matter what,athorough case by case analysis is important.

A good example is that of a lady who has been over & about will men from her childhood and gets a mr.xx who she now needs to settle dowm with in life.Of course such a gal may have all the skills to make sure that she dont get a child .To add salt to the injury,she goes a head and fake virginity or whatever you can call it.So you meet her and you are over the moon.ONE OUT OF A BILLION but in real sence...............If by any chance a dude can come to know this,that will be the end of trust.You feel deceived,ma?

But here is a young gal who happen to have fallen into trap.Personaly i do advise ladies that having a child with some one should not be a reason to force yourself into marriage if by anychance the dude does not love you.Things do happen and sometimes a child is born out of lust and not love.Such a gal should just take care of the baby and with time she will finally meet the man of herlife.I really respect such ladies so much since its not an easy job.

The case differs for a lady with ababy as a result of marriage.Whether its a church wedding or just a traditional marriage and the man is still a live,such should be avoided at all cost but if you dont,please be ready to pay the price.

In a nutshell,take time and learn someone b4 making your decision.A good wife comes from the Lord.Remember a man/lady can be virgin for real but you never know what might happen after marriage.Pray and ask God for direction.


Without Holiness no man shall see God.Dear God,mould me to be a vessel of honour at this End times,to remain Obedient to your Word in all situations.Amen!
Donedeal
#36 Posted : Monday, July 06, 2009 12:36:00 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 1/13/2009
Posts: 60
@Karuss,i'd say it depends on how old you are....if you are 40 and above go for option 1,the 'case by case' advise,if you are 30 and below,go for option 2,moibutu's advise...If you are neither,then continue dating until you are either one of the two options....Personally,if it were me,i would have my cake and eat it!


May we live in interesting times!
karuss
#37 Posted : Monday, July 06, 2009 12:39:00 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 7/6/2009
Posts: 40
@Nanfor..i honestly don think this topic belongs in the 70's....am sure most guys find the topic interesting...besides,these are issues probably most of us have not had a chance to discuss....so..keep em coming...

@MR.Tea,i agree,someone who keeps so worried bout ur baby may just not be ready for a serious relationship....the earlier the chic juas,...we call it running for the hills?yeah...dat one!

@Ngwono.....well said all the way....Agood man or woman comes from the lord...someone needs to pray


WIN WIN SITUATION
karuss
#38 Posted : Monday, July 06, 2009 12:44:00 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 7/6/2009
Posts: 40
@donedeal...i hear you..does that mean that guys below 30 should never marry someone if have a child they have not fathered??i did not understand ur point quite clearly..

WIN WIN SITUATION
The Real Shaft
#39 Posted : Monday, July 06, 2009 1:35:00 PM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 11/19/2008
Posts: 839
sasa wewe utanunua jembe...

ili upalilie shamba iliyo na mavuno...???

sa laa leeee.....

makuu haya.....

what kind of 'standing men'.......are we.....???

i would rather try the unploughed land first...

than the tested one.....

I'm the real Massey F.....shut your mouth
I'm the real Massey Fergu...... Shut your mouth....
Gordon Gekko
#40 Posted : Monday, July 06, 2009 2:10:00 PM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 5/27/2008
Posts: 3,760
No problem,so long as the child is a girl. No way someone else's son will be inheriting my modest wealth.
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