WTF!!!!!!!!

Imagining that you can live a secret life is being in a dream-world. Your secret life is as much a part of your life as your toes are part of your body.

I will even go as far as saying that there is no such thing as a secret life and the phrase secret life is an oxymoron.

All of us live only one life.

It is so delusional to imagine that you can have more than one life by trying to conceal some of the private things you do in public from some people, then tell yourself that you are safe. Anything you try to conceal arouses the same curiosity and the same sense of adventure that you go looking for when you commit adultery. Adultery is a trap. Nothing good can come from it.

I once asked my husband to show me what pleasure he had gotten out of adultery and he had nothing to show for it. There really is nothing to show for it.

It is as tempting to talk about your adulterous life as it is to commit adultery. So if you are an adulterer, do not be deceived that you and your partner who are unable to control your libidos, can control your tongues. Forget it! That is a lie and the sooner you accept it, the better. Only one who can control his/her libido can also control his/her tongue.

You either have self-control or you don’t have it.

I am sorry to be so blunt about this subject but this is the only type of language that I can use to get the point I want to make in this lesson as clear as daylight because it is an important one.

One night, when I had moved to the visitors room which I was sharing with my baby boy, I had just put the baby back to bed and lay down to go back to sleep myself when my husband came home. It was around 2am. As I lay there hearing him coming into the house and up the stairs and into his room getting myself back to sleep, he opened the door of the room I was in and I panicked but just for a moment; a long enough moment to keep me awake to hear what he did. He walked over to a cupboard in the room and did something in it for a few seconds and then he walked out of the room and left and did not come back.

I then just slept but purposed to check what was in that cupboard the next morning.

The next morning after he left for work, I ransacked that cupboard and found nothing until I checked inside the pockets of some of his old suit jackets that were hanged in that cupboard. There I found some tablets. I googled the description of the tablets and found that they were ARVs – anti retroviral drugs – for treating HIV. I composed myself with the knowledge that someone had used that room, not too long ago, who I knew was taking the drugs.

I was very confused because I started to remember seeing similar drugs before which my husband had told me belonged to someone else. I also remembered a demand letter that had been written to my husband when our wedding arrangements were under way in which a lawyer had claimed that my husband had infected his client with HIV. Needless to say, I was reeling with shock. I was telling myself that it cannot be possible that my husband could be HIV positive.

Anyway; I did what I had learned to do by then, which was to talk to God and not to my husband. At that point it occurred to me that my husband was a dangerous man. I prayed and told God that if the medicines were my husband’s, let him come and do the same thing he did in that cupboard on another night. 2 days later, he did it again.

Oh my goodness. I did not sleep well that night, and for many nights thereafter. The next morning I rushed to my doctor and did a full medical check including an HIV test.

Throughout my 3 pregnancies, I was HIV negative. I had natural births. My doctor and the hospital I went to are among the most reputable and so I knew at that time that my children were safe. But what about me? Maybe this was really what was going to kill me and not the madness I had been convinced was the killer.

For 3 days I waited for the test results. When I got the call from my doctor’s office telling me that I was still on the clear, I was seated in the car and screamed hallelujah and thanked God and for several days later, I played the song by Shiro wa GP ‘Ni Kuri Ngai Matuini’ in my car and my computer throughout. I had seen God’s Mighty Hand in my life.

I then got to find out that God had exceeded my expectations by astronomical proportions. It turned out that my husband had been sneaking ARVs into our home, storing them in a briefcase and secretly disposing of the boxes from before our second-born was born.

This is no joke or lie. This is the cold hard truth about the world we live in. This is what God wants me to tell you about which I myself and no other, has seen happen. A miracle of all miracles.

When I moved to my mum’s house, this truth just got bigger. A very close friend of my husband’s who was in school with him said that my husband was HIV positive from before we were married and he was shocked that my husband had not told me! Haiya!! People have talked and it is shocking that they knew about my husband’s condition and said nothing.

I know it was God who planned it that way. God wanted to show His glory in my life. I had to go through that marriage to see it. Goodness, what other explanation could there be?

For those of you who do not speak my mother tongue, please excuse me because there are just some things that hit home when you go back home. Those of you who speak my mother tongue; listen to Shiro wa GP’s song and also the one by Ruth Wamuyu, ‘Amukira Ngatho’. Waaaaa!! For days I praised God and praised Him and praised Him and I am still praising Him now as I write this story for the benefit of millions.

I stupidly just trusted my husband. At that time I was a 29 year old lawyer and a fool. I deserved to die for that stupid mistake, thousands have fallen dead beside me and I have seen them; ten thousands all around me but I have not been harmed. My protection I now know comes from God and so I also know that I could still die, if I am not very careful about every move I make and ensure that I always tell the truth forever and ever amen.

My children and I are my husband’s greatest blessing from God. The Bible says so. Yet, he chose to destroy our home in preference to what? All the evidence I have is circumstantial but it is good enough for me. If it was good enough for me to trust him and risk my life, it is good enough for me to convict him and save my life.

I like to say that God made me immune to evil. I believe my immunity has more to do with the person that I am than the biology of my make-up. Goodness can protect you. One good deed deserves another and not one of my in-laws can claim that I did not do more than enough good to deserve good health.

Nevertheless, God’s grace is for free and so I accept it graciously with hands that are willing to do whatever He asks like telling my story for all to know Him.

When God called me, all I had were stories that people told to me concerning problems they were facing. I would then document those stories into legal documents and go present to court and let the Judge/Magistrate decide the case.

Even now, all I have is my story concerning a problem I am facing which I am documenting and presenting to the public and letting them choose between living a lie or living the truth.

When God calls you, He only asks for what He has already given you.

Gosh this woman is gutsy; now to appear Thu 9pm Citizen news with Lilian Muli and Fri 8.30pm on K24. How unreasonable!


Lesson 30

I know that God is on my side and if He is for me, who can be against me?

My dear friends, I hear you; all of you who support and oppose me.

Silence is a killer. It truly is. Keep up the comments. I know you will all agree that once you post your comment whether it is for or against me, you feel a burden lifted from your heart. That my dear friends is what we need.

We need to talk about sexual immorality and stop talking statistics but talk real life examples.

I am an example of what sexual immorality can do to a family. I have spoken out very loudly on the subject by writing a blog about my experience. I have refused to be silenced.

This week I will be appearing on television. Lilian Muli of Citizen Television interviewed me yesterday and will air the story on Thursday this week as a news item at 9pm. The show for K24 will air on Friday at 8.30pm.

The same shock I got from finding out about my husband’s infidelity is the same shock that my talking has administered to the Kenyan public. People are crying out uncontrollably, just like I did! Yes, God’s ways are not our ways.

You who are reading my blog and the comments posted now have a better understanding of what a spouse’s infidelity can do to a nation. Infidelity hurts. It is as painful as rape. I have never heard of a rape victim being asked to keep quiet. I have also never heard of a rape victim being told that the rape is a private matter between the rape victim and the rapist.

Sexual immorality in our society must be stopped. It must be stopped more for the benefit of the players than for the benefit of we who are watching them play.

Ultimately, the players are guaranteed death and destruction. Nothing good can come from sexual immorality. Those who refuse to play in the game can be destroyed if they value the players more than they value themselves. I survived because I reached a point where I put myself first and started loving me and taking care of me.

Now that I have managed by God’s grace to get the Kenyan public in on what was happening in my home, it is time for those of us who are not willing to tolerate sexual immorality to do something radical that will get the attention of those doing it and make them realize they are destroying themselves.

Kenyans need to say no to sexual immorality. It is very easy for us to end sexual immorality. All we need is for those who are affected by it in any way to talk about it.

Please come to the next Group Support and Awareness Session (GSAS) at the Multi-Purpose Hall of Calvary Worship Centre, Riara Road, next to Makini School, on Saturday 28th September 2013 from 3.30pm to 5.30pm. I will be there at 1.30pm for those who would like to chat before the session begins.

God bless our beautiful country Kenya!

LOL

Very real. Just sitaki matusi lakini ningetaja jina @.....y.

Ala! She doing a PHD with the husband as the subject? That is a blog from 2007.

Isn't this stretching it? It all boils down to individuals.. thats why people date.

At some point she will become the victim her 'salvation' will not take her far..

Excerpt from her blog back in 2007.

What changed?


It is very important to know that your relationship with your spouse is a confidential relationship. Not something to be talked about and discussed with others. The solution to your problems with your spouse lies in talking to him/her. Keep an open mind, remember that you are brought up differently. Talk and listen and be willing to understand a different view from your own. You are married to the person so only you know how best to address a difficulty you are having. Telling outsiders about your relationship problems only gives them something to snigger about and gives them comfort that your life is not as good as they imagined. Very few people will have your best interests at heart. Keep the Vultures OUT!