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Married Bachelor,,,,working away from home?
Jacy26
#11 Posted : Wednesday, October 07, 2009 7:44:00 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 6/26/2008
Posts: 365
@Wendz,I feel you. Had the same kind of experience from childhood. In adulthood,one year of separation felt like 20 years,we could not connect and felt like strangers when we met,so since I was the one suffering,I resigned from my job which I dearly loved,packed my belongings and joined him. Phew,I can say the sacrifice is well worth it.

I will praise thee,O Lord my God,with all my heart: And I will glorify thy name forever more. Psalms 86:12
If you have only one smile in you, give it to the people you love - Maya Angelou
Wendz
#12 Posted : Wednesday, October 07, 2009 7:54:00 AM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 6/19/2008
Posts: 4,268
@ jacy

'we could not connect and felt like strangers when we met'

You couldnt have put it any better!!

Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.

Surealligator
#13 Posted : Wednesday, October 07, 2009 8:07:00 AM
Rank: User

Joined: 6/27/2008
Posts: 709
Location: Velayat-e Faryab
@Fuchu

Men,now you are talking. Was married to a Spanish lady who used to travel from one corner of the globe to the other due to the nature of her work. Used to travel with her once in a while but after our first born,she started staying away for months. Men,now I have to fend for myself and a four yr boy.

I will never encourage one to marry and work far and away from home within the first ten years. However,after ten years,its okay to agree you go to your shags while she works in Nai so that you can develop where both of you will spend your sunset years.

However,if she is the one to go to shags first,ensure she has plenty at hand to take care of,I.e.,keep the kids coming,grade cows,invite relatives etc Pole Wendz before unishambulie.

@Wendz

You can leave your family for work but in most cases,when the family is young,husband and wife should live in the same house on a daily basis mpaka when you start boring each other,one can go start working in Mombasa and the marriage will always feel fresh when you come home after two weeks.

@Skodhe

Hii nini &lsquo;kusengenyana na kupagana kwa plot&rsquo; Maybe you meant Kugawana kwa plot. Don&rsquo;t mind me old boy.



They walk among us,and they reproduce.
Go overdrive in purchasing the goods when there's blood on the streets, expecially if the blood is your own
Kamaa
#14 Posted : Wednesday, October 07, 2009 8:08:00 AM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 10/6/2007
Posts: 1,177
Location: Nairobi - Kenya
marital life is full of ups & downs...

you can live away from your family not because you got jobs at different places (which you don't want to let go) but coz you cannot make ends meet,e.g you live in nrb and your job cannot cater for your family's needs so you take them to your rural home and continue hustling in the town...

as for fuchu he is lucky he is having it hard coz he got job away from where the spouse is working from...this means at the end of the day they will still got two sources of bread winning...(and that can console their living apart)

depending on their priorities they will deliberate their way forward...

When you run so fast to get somewhere,you miss the fun of getting there... Life is not a race,so take it slowly....
When you hear what I say, you will not understand. When you see what I do, you will not comprehend
Kamaa
#15 Posted : Wednesday, October 07, 2009 8:12:00 AM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 10/6/2007
Posts: 1,177
Location: Nairobi - Kenya
@ surealligator

na wewe ni mnoma...!

are you still married or...?

When you run so fast to get somewhere,you miss the fun of getting there... Life is not a race,so take it slowly....
When you hear what I say, you will not understand. When you see what I do, you will not comprehend
adept
#16 Posted : Wednesday, October 07, 2009 8:20:00 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 12/8/2008
Posts: 359
Tried it one time but as already stated here,conversations start to get awkward. IMHO,separation is to be resisted at all costs. We are all human and at some point,something's gotta give. Even the Bible warns against wives and husbands nyimaing each other for too long lest they give daimonos a window of opportunity. Me thinks this is even more critical for younger couples.

@Jacy26 - That was a bold but very wise move.
oops
#17 Posted : Wednesday, October 07, 2009 8:54:00 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 10/23/2008
Posts: 234
as someone said sometimes circumstances can force.....
now what about long distance relationship.......am just involving myself .......and i dont know wht to expect......
any advice.........bearing in mind you need to know each other better.......any experience?

Bother not about yesterday's mistake,try to correct it today and avoid it tomorrow.
Pablo
#18 Posted : Wednesday, October 07, 2009 12:25:00 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 3/17/2008
Posts: 567
Location: Nairobi
I once heard Caro Mutoko say that if a wife is one who cleans the house,washes the dishes,warms your food and prepares your bath,she also wants a wife. smile

Want to be a millionaire.... plant a million cabbages and sell them at a bob...
half_empty
#19 Posted : Wednesday, October 07, 2009 12:46:00 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 3/23/2007
Posts: 127
yes you can...but communicate before hand... i've been married for 10 yrs and it was clear from the beginning that my job involved lots of travel... lately i can only travel home 2-3 times a year... & yeah the strain is getting to me... lakini investments sio mbaya
Ericks
#20 Posted : Wednesday, October 07, 2009 12:46:00 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 7/29/2008
Posts: 170
@ pablo... lol thats a good one....

it can go either way,situations ni nyingi,zingine zashika na zingine hazishiki....... picture this....a friend of mine and all her sibblings (they are 6 in total) were born in july,coz the dad used to work for nyayo tea zone of them days and he could only get his leave in november... the employer couldnt allow any visitors and he wasnt allowed to leave the work place any other time so he had to wait for november..... july is like xmas for them but u can imagine what the parents went through waiting for each other for a whole year.......

Its just me whatever choice you make in life make sure that you can live with it.
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