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Why so many marriages are in crisis
Rank: Elder Joined: 11/15/2011 Posts: 4,518
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@ shak  I am with you in prayers. "The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/22/2009 Posts: 2,449 Location: Africa
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essyk wrote:@ shak I am with you in prayers. @essyk, marriage is a real learning process.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 11/15/2011 Posts: 4,518
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Shak wrote:essyk wrote:@ shak I am with you in prayers. @essyk, marriage is a real learning process. It is.Am woriah's 4th wife and we all live amicably. Your bro is breaking hearts and damaging his more. First lesson was learned why go for more headache if you can't hold it together? God will help him. "The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 10/28/2008 Posts: 2,276 Location: Kibish
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essyk wrote:Shak wrote:essyk wrote:@ shak I am with you in prayers. @essyk, marriage is a real learning process. It is.Am woriah's 4th wife and we all live amicably. Your bro is breaking hearts and damaging his more. First lesson was learned why go for more headache if you can't hold it together? God will help him. @essyk have you ever been tempted, let's say kufeel like eating chapos instead of regular ugali?????? Nadondosha meli kubwa seuze ngalawa!
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Rank: Elder Joined: 11/15/2011 Posts: 4,518
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Coolio wrote:
@essyk have you ever been tempted, let's say kufeel like eating chapos instead of regular ugali??????
weeeee!usifanye mukiri and alpha waniamkie na fimbo cz u wont be here when they crucify me. am a good village gal.  above temptations. By the way si we were to walk to donge. "The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/22/2009 Posts: 2,449 Location: Africa
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essyk wrote:Shak wrote:essyk wrote:@ shak I am with you in prayers. @essyk, marriage is a real learning process. It is.Am woriah's 4th wife and we all live amicably. Your bro is breaking hearts and damaging his more. First lesson was learned why go for more headache if you can't hold it together? God will help him. you will not find him single at any one time. When one marriage breaks off there's always another to take her place. I guess it's just his weakness
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Rank: Elder Joined: 11/15/2011 Posts: 4,518
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Shak wrote:
you will not find him single at any one time. When one marriage breaks off there's always another to take her place. I guess it's just his weakness
He must be tall dark handsome and loaded.Those ones don't even sleep in peace. But as a sister I know how you feel-he's being used and dumped. I pity him but what to do except to ask God to deliver him from that bondage. His eyes will open don't worry. "The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/22/2009 Posts: 2,449 Location: Africa
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essyk wrote:Shak wrote:
you will not find him single at any one time. When one marriage breaks off there's always another to take her place. I guess it's just his weakness
He must be tall dark handsome and loaded.Those ones don't even sleep in peace. But as a sister I know how you feel-he's being used and dumped. I pity him but what to do except to ask God to deliver him from that bondage. His eyes will open don't worry. He is quite tall and pretty loaded. He is also very out going. We do get concerned that the women are mainly after his money. Problem is he falls really hard and fast and i think girls use that to take advantage of him
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Rank: Elder Joined: 11/15/2011 Posts: 4,518
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Shak wrote:essyk wrote:Shak wrote:
you will not find him single at any one time. When one marriage breaks off there's always another to take her place. I guess it's just his weakness
He must be tall dark handsome and loaded.Those ones don't even sleep in peace. But as a sister I know how you feel-he's being used and dumped. I pity him but what to do except to ask God to deliver him from that bondage. His eyes will open don't worry. He is quite tall and pretty loaded. He is also very out going. We do get concerned that the women are mainly after his money. Problem is he falls really hard and fast and i think girls use that to take advantage of him he lets them do so and as a sister there's nothing you can do but observe in pain. He is not a happy man at all,Not even with his money cz money never gives peace.All those actions point to a desperate soul in seek of peace but it comes in the wrong way. But never stop talking to him. my bro is taking care of a baby that is not his.He believes the child is his cz he's been away. But he loves the woman so much. Their relationship is not my biz so I cannot interfere cz hes grown up. "The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 7/11/2012 Posts: 5,222
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Bigchick wrote:Shak wrote:Muheani wrote:Shak wrote:@muheani, i'm thinking more of the urban set up as opposed to the village Good I Schooled In The Village...migrated To The City..went Back To The Village For former Mrs. The Village For The Villager.. The Urbane For The Urbanites. I know very many cases of men who become successful then leave their village wives to marry those who are more educated. There is one who left his wife coz once the phone rang while the man was in the toilet and the wife answered. Turns out it was his senior at work. Rather than tell the guy that the husband was not available and would call later, she told him that he was in the toilet and caused him a lot of embarrassment Aii! That one had his own issues and was waiying for an excuse to make thr move. What is embarrassing about being in the toilet.Kwani that Snr doesnt go to the toilet? Kwani he could take his wife for basic etiquette training? Chenzi yeye. On the topic:-Our poor mamas perservered abuse, neglect, humilation etc because hawakuwa na chao.They were housewifes to be seen never to be heard.With due respect to men some of you are baaaad.So gals of today are able to either straighten you up or walk out and lead a quite life without you. Solution to this crisis, communication, respect for each other and give and take and above all Love each other. Ditto. Every lady is wife material, depends on what material you want and how you intend to wear it.
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Rank: Member Joined: 6/22/2011 Posts: 561 Location: House
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essyk wrote:Shak wrote:It just dawned on me why so many marriages today are falling apart. haiya.lol!it started in the old testament,just that we weren't there. It falls apart cz 2 people deliberately decide/choose to break it apart.No excuse holds. eg.Mrs ngoyoyo demanding that Mr Ngoyoyo report home daily by 6pm.. 6 months down the line,he won't be reporting back for years. radio wrote:When you get back tell us whether you are a villager or urbanite? Define villager and urbanite plus the basis of your defination. @essyk ngogoyo here, ngogoyo pale ...eish! Could you be dreaming ngogoyo? Points raised are true by far On that issue of ding dong ...dingoingo ngogoyo I have great news and will share in the respective thread by thur
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 11/14/2006 Posts: 1,311
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TD Jakes says that men and women speak different languages.
Communication between a man and a woman is like when the woman is speaking greek to the man who can only understands Russian. He thinks he has understood what she says and answers back in his native Russian language....she thinks she is understanding.... until actions confirm they are worlds apart in understanding each other.
Women are from venus, Men are from Mars.
Women talk in circles, Men talk straight.
Women process thoughts externally by talking, Men process thoughts internally quietly.
Women have feelings and emotions in their communication, Men understand facts and logic more than feelings.
Communication is the major problem.... we never understand each other.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 12/9/2009 Posts: 6,592 Location: Nairobi
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Shak wrote:It just dawned on me why so many marriages today are falling apart. It has to do with the way girls are raised today. Girls are today raised to aspire to excel in their careers. They are told they can do anything a man can. Little emphasis is placed on roles in marriage. For boys the message has not changed. They are taught that they are the heads of their homes. So girls having been pampered, well educated and treated well at home expect the same treatment from their husbands only to be net with expectations that are not in tune with their upbringing. They wonder why they should serve the man yet they were taught that men and women are equals. Power plays are the end result along with broken marriages We could blame the ladies but the men are to blame as well. I agree with you that there's a problem with the way we're bringing up our kids today. But I also think there's a bigger problem in men. They've become sissys and don't take responsibility anymore. A man main asset was integrity, keeping his word which in return earn him respect, that way anything you do or say becomes law.
BBI will solve it :)
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Rank: Elder Joined: 4/22/2010 Posts: 11,522 Location: Nairobi
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cheating...from both sides possunt quia posse videntur
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Rank: Elder Joined: 11/15/2011 Posts: 4,518
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Ngogoyo wrote:@essyk ngogoyo here, ngogoyo pale ...eish! Could you be dreaming ngogoyo? Points raised are true by far On that issue of ding dong ...dingoingo ngogoyo I have great news and will share in the respective thread by thur Shuu!! Mr.Ngogoyo Dingoingo. Wewe mimi Nachapa mateke pia Let me tell u a secret about us ladies. If you keep nodding your head to everything a woman says you become a sissy. We like it when you do what we ask you to do, but we hate the fact that you are a Yes man all the time. I don't know if you understand that. A good man says No and earns respect from his woman. "The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
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Rank: Member Joined: 2/27/2011 Posts: 518
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Ngogoyo wrote:essyk wrote:Shak wrote:It just dawned on me why so many marriages today are falling apart. haiya.lol!it started in the old testament,just that we weren't there. It falls apart cz 2 people deliberately decide/choose to break it apart.No excuse holds. eg.Mrs ngoyoyo demanding that Mr Ngoyoyo report home daily by 6pm.. 6 months down the line,he won't be reporting back for years. radio wrote:When you get back tell us whether you are a villager or urbanite? Define villager and urbanite plus the basis of your defination. @essyk ngogoyo here, ngogoyo pale ...eish! Could you be dreaming ngogoyo? Points raised are true by far On that issue of ding dong ...dingoingo ngogoyo I have great news and will share in the respective thread by thur ha! hata hauitwi ngogoyo. Essyk reads it as ngoYOYO! Throughout. Anyway, Si hii Thursday ifike basi! eagerly awaiting the storo
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Rank: Member Joined: 8/15/2008 Posts: 16 Location: Nairobi
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I attended a PTA meeting last weekend and one of the parents who is a lecturer made quite a shocking statement; that she realized her fresher students, none believed in real love. They all think its all lust and convenience! They are all of microwave society mentality of good life, instant gratification and many things Maina suggests.
If you were to marry one from that group, will the marriage last?
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Rank: Member Joined: 1/28/2013 Posts: 182
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essyk wrote:@ big chick,at the old wazees meeting. @ shak,ur stats below. Quote:Divorce cases filed at Milimani are drawn from Christian marriages. In 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004 and 2005, the number of divorce cases filed at Milimani were 101, 115, 206, 296 and 295 respectively. In 2007 and 2008, the numbers rose to 357 and 369.
Hundreds of couples are seeking legal advice, with some law firms handling as high as 26 cases, and others up to 50 cases, in a year
On average, the registrar of marriages at the Attorney General’s office records about 174 civil marriages in a month, basing on the statistics of January to May 2008, when they had 697 ceremonies and 925 from January to May, 2009.
Mukiriiiii!!  say something. Is pre nup a sin?? cz I fully support it. Hapa ndio shida huanza. Pre-nup ya nini? Man must live!
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Rank: Member Joined: 10/4/2007 Posts: 656
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The thing is: Women are trying hard to catch up Earn like a man Rave like a man Drink like a m Be bosy like a man Cheat like a man Simply, Women have become men!! The way I am
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Rank: Elder Joined: 11/15/2011 Posts: 4,518
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urstill wrote:essyk wrote:@ big chick,at the old wazees meeting. @ shak,ur stats below. Quote:Divorce cases filed at Milimani are drawn from Christian marriages. In 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004 and 2005, the number of divorce cases filed at Milimani were 101, 115, 206, 296 and 295 respectively. In 2007 and 2008, the numbers rose to 357 and 369.
Hundreds of couples are seeking legal advice, with some law firms handling as high as 26 cases, and others up to 50 cases, in a year
On average, the registrar of marriages at the Attorney General’s office records about 174 civil marriages in a month, basing on the statistics of January to May 2008, when they had 697 ceremonies and 925 from January to May, 2009.
Mukiriiiii!! say something. Is pre nup a sin?? cz I fully support it. Hapa ndio shida huanza. Pre-nup ya nini? Jua mapema mapema what you are getting into. People have become so materialistic and it's difficult to tell during courtship cz everyone is an angel It's just a safety precaution against materialistic minds. "The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
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