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294 Pages«<191192193194195>»
Just for laughs...corner
nostoppingthis
#1921 Posted : Tuesday, December 03, 2013 10:36:42 PM
Rank: Chief

Joined: 8/24/2009
Posts: 5,909
Location: Nairobi
butterflyke wrote:
Dear Microsoft, If you had called your search engine Bang instead of Bing, you'd have destroyed Google. What would you rather say? "I just Googled Charlize Theron" or "I just Banged Charlize Theron"?


smile smile @Butterflyke, do you have a marketing background?
butterflyke
#1922 Posted : Thursday, December 05, 2013 8:46:46 AM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 5/1/2010
Posts: 3,024
Location: Hapa
A man driving carefully and a woman driving carelessly are in collision. Their cars are wrecked but they escape without injury. Miraculously, a bottle of wine remains unbroken in the woman’s car.

“Let’s drink to our survival,” she says, and hands the bottle to the man. He drains a good half and hands it back, but the woman replaces the cork. “Are you not going to drink?” he asks. “Nah,” she says, “I’ll just wait until the police arrive with their breathalyser

C&P
Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. - Muhammad Ali🐝
butterflyke
#1923 Posted : Thursday, December 05, 2013 8:48:29 AM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 5/1/2010
Posts: 3,024
Location: Hapa
nostoppingthis wrote:
butterflyke wrote:
Dear Microsoft, If you had called your search engine Bang instead of Bing, you'd have destroyed Google. What would you rather say? "I just Googled Charlize Theron" or "I just Banged Charlize Theron"?


smile smile @Butterflyke, do you have a marketing background?


heheheh...nope

C&P
Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. - Muhammad Ali🐝
brav
#1924 Posted : Thursday, December 05, 2013 12:22:48 PM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 11/26/2008
Posts: 745
C&P

A LETTER FROM A Mc-Mende MOTHER TO SON

Dear Son,

I'm writing this slow 'cause I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left. Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within twenty miles of home, so we moved. Won't be able to send you the address as the last Arkansas family that lived here took the numbers with them for their house, so they wouldn't have to change their address.

This place has a washing machine. The first day I put four shirts in it, pulled the chain and haven't seen 'em since.

It only rained twice this week, three days the first time and four days the second time.

The coat you wanted me to send to you, Aunt Sue said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with them heavy buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.

We got a bill from the funeral home, and it said if we didn't make the final payment on Grandma's funderal bill, up she comes.

About your sister, she had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether if it is a boy or a girl so don't know if you are an Aunt or Uncle.

Your Uncle John fell in the whiskey vat. Some men tried to get him out, but he fought them off playfully, so he drowned. We cremated him and he burned for three days.

Three of your friends went off the bridge in a pickup. One was driving and the other two were in the back. The driver got out. He rolled down the window and swam to safery. The other 2 drowned. They couldn't get the tail gate down.

Not much more news this time. Nothing much happened. If you don't get this letter, please let me know and I will send another one.

Love, Ma
symbols
#1925 Posted : Thursday, December 05, 2013 10:36:31 PM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 3/19/2013
Posts: 2,552
washiku
#1926 Posted : Friday, December 06, 2013 9:44:57 AM
Rank: Chief

Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
"Ladies want a man who is 6 feet tall, has a 6 pack and earns 6 figure salary. ILLUMINATI!!!!!"
Birthright
#1927 Posted : Friday, December 06, 2013 1:00:59 PM
Rank: New-farer

Joined: 10/22/2012
Posts: 17
There was a millionaire, who collected live
alligators.
He kept them in the pool in back of his mansion.
The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who
was single.
One day he decides to throw a huge party, and
during the party he announces, "My dear
guests . . . I have a proposition to every man here.
I will give one million dollars or my daughter to the
man who can swim across this pool full of
alligators and emerge alive!"
As soon as he finished his last word, there was the
sound of a large splash! There was one guy in the
pool swimming with all he could and screaming out
of fear.
The crowd cheered him on as he kept stroking as
though he was running for his life. Finally, he made
it to the other side with only a torn shirt and some
minor injuries.
The millionaire was impressed. He said, "My boy
that was incredible! Fantastic! I didn't think it
could be done! Well I must keep my end of the
bargain.
Do you want my daughter or the one million
dollars?"
The guy says, "Listen, I don't want your money, nor
do I want your daughter! I want the person who
pushed me in that water!"
Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly
What if one day Google was deleted and we couldn't Google what happened to Google
washiku
#1928 Posted : Friday, December 06, 2013 11:29:16 PM
Rank: Chief

Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
If you don't know who Mandela is, please be silent. a girl just updated her status
Magigi
#1929 Posted : Saturday, December 07, 2013 6:58:50 PM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 3/31/2008
Posts: 7,081
Location: Kenya
washiku
#1930 Posted : Tuesday, December 10, 2013 1:21:11 PM
Rank: Chief

Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
When a Kamba says "Muli amepaint" do you look at the wall or call an ambulance?
294 Pages«<191192193194195>»
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