Posted: Saturday, September 29, 2012 12:41:28 PM

an interview with a kenyan Mpig...

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Interviewer "so, are you saying that we should have 100 plus parties in Kenya?"

Mpig "Oh yes. In fact each and every MP should be allowed to have his own party...that is what competitive politics means, hahahahahahahaha!"

Interviewer "And why do people call you Mpigs"

Mpig "I don't know! But we are investigating the source of that name. Once we a through, we will table a bill in the parliament to make it illegal to use that name"

Interviewer "Are you comfortable with the idea of paying taxes?"

Mpig "No!! No way!!!How can i be?? Nobody is comfortable on paying tax...As a matter of fact Njiraini must go. Since when did a Kenyan MP pay tax? Even the constitution does not allow that!!. This amounts to harassing the MPs knowing far too well that MPs earn peanuts"

Interviewer "But sir even Jesus Christ said, give unto ceasar what belongs to him, referring to tax."

Mpig "Hahahaha! You know you guys are quite funny. You only read those parts that suits you. That man did not know what he was talking about. No wonder he was crucified because of telling people to pay tax. Also, don't forget that when Judas brokered Jesus to the Pharisees, he earned money, 30 silver pieces and do you know what happened after that?"

Interviewer "No. Tell me"

Mpig "The authorities told him (Judas) to pay tax and Judas refused. When they sent Zackayo to collect the tax from Judas and Judas got a whim that he was coming, Judas took the option of committing suicide rather than paying the tax. We as the MPs are in a similar situation. If anybody touches our salaries in the name of tax we will all commit suicide. and we mean it"

Interviewer "Oh My God!!!"

Mpig "Like i will keep telling you an ordinary Kenyan MP may be the most highly paid in the World but the constituency ground rules forces us to be the biggest spenders, donors and hand-out politicians in the world, hahahahahaha! you know what i mean"

Interviewer "Now that the athletes will be required to pay tax on their winnings will it not be in order for you MPs to table a bill in parliament to force KRA to include the athletes in the tax exempt cadre?"

Mpig "No! No! No! No! No! This cannot happen! Each one has to fight their own battles like we have done. Infact the athletes should pay tax just like the rest of the people. How else do you expect the government to meet its obligations if people refuse to pay taxes?

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I think it's the high time we patented that name before they make it illegal to use! We could sell it for a few dollars sometime in the future... hehehehehe... to some musician!

...pine tree and landing.

I was on a flight once with the very same Ongeri...it was to a regional capital, and he scoffed 2 meals in 45 minutes...MPIG is perfect to describe him.