Hiyo ni kali sana sana sana

I think times and priorities have changed and our generation is rotten. Siku hizi women look for dudes with cash and its not considered as immoral anymore in fact, it is now termed as survival. The dudes have found it impossible to stay faithful. We have copied the western culture of fun fun fun without responsibility. It is a pity. So many homes have been broken and the children who grow up in such homes lack confidence in marriage.

However, marriage is a good thing. We can not compare one couple with another. Love is not enough to make a marriage work...it takes way more than love. It has challenges that we can all overcome if we really want to but it takes 2 people to make it work and 2 people to break it.

People say that once the contract is signed then everything changes. I disagree. If you have lived with someone for like 3 years and decide to sign the certificate then what really changes???

All in all, people should not rush into marriage. We have a lifetime ahead of us why rush. And if a MAn is not willing to be patient and wait for the woman he loves, then he is not worth it at all, same applies to the woman.

Ati siku hizi? That practice has been going on since time immemorial.

@jguru i think you are too old skul whats up with the trouser and submissiveness.
How do you rate your wife as being submissive?

I'm weighing in a bit late on the discussion but this is my take.

If we look as some of the traditional ceremonies that take place before a wedding, they had a purpose in determining the most fundamental of requirements that any woman seeks - SECURITY. This is borne of the instinctive nature of ensuring that offspring are able to survive and hence perpetuate the human race.

In this country, we moved to a cash-based economy because the European settlers wanted cheap labor to work their farms. They achieved this by imposed a hut tax that had to be paid in cash. From this developed a population where security is determined by money and not land as their land was taken by the colonial government.

Traditionally land provided security as economic activity could take place on it. At that time money was not used as a medium of exchange. However with advances in healthcare, there has been a population explosion which has put immense pressure on natural resources. This is why land remains an emotive issue as the majority of the Kenyan populace is still agrarian in nature.

Therefore it is only natural that women would look at money as a source of security and should not be called names. If women are able to find this security by themselves without the help of a man, then they will not see the need to attach themselves to a man under the covenant of marriage.

For marriages to survive, participants need to take this into consideration and change their ATTITUDES towards everything including money.

I fully agree with 192000