My friends, I am now quite certain that the government of Kenya is not only indifferent to my plight, but is willing to go to the length of destroying me as an individual, and to destroy my daughter, and many other innocent people under my care.
I know I am crazy. I am probably a Schizophrenic, and maybe all this suffering and injustice I am experiencing is because of this. You are all my witnesses: I am probably not the most cogent person you know, for example.
But it must not be impossible for me to earn a decent and honest living given my identity, skill and intention. This source of human dignity is something that I am unlikely to ever enjoy. I have never enjoyed it thus far.
The laws claim that I have these rights. But for all my life, even when I have merited it, the law, and the relevant government institutions have not come to my aid. Like now, I have been chasing a case all over government offices to no avail, and I am sure that not even the courts will help me.
I will not kill myself. I will not kill my daughter and my dependents. And neither will I beg for mercy and pity. I am saying this because many years ago, still in this Kenya, I saw a man in my situation kill his child and himself, even after begging all over the place for social protection. I have been tempted to do it. But I won't. I want my child(ten) to live. I want to live.
If any of you knows of a better way I can follow, please, let me know. Because all my life I have only wished for peace. I have only wanted to live a normal life like most of you. But alas, all indicators show that I am not about to have such a life.