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Child custody - married parents
Rank: Elder Joined: 7/28/2015 Posts: 9,562 Location: Rodi Kopany, Homa Bay
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There is alot we can learn from the Obama story. The mother and stepdad should be allowed to raise the child without interference. Infact Obama only became interested in his roots in his adulthood (and was disappointed by what he learnt about his biological father). Otherwise he grew up as a very happy and successful child raised though raised without any influence or input from his biological dad. Likewise in this case, the daughter should be raised without the biological dad stalking the family and being a nuisance. The daughter can go look for his biological dad in adulthood so as to satisfy her curiosity. 
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 10/29/2008 Posts: 1,566
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Obama had a disturbed teenage. He kept wondering why his father had 'left paradise'. His Mother had to keep making excuses for the Father. Isuni yilu yi maa me muyo - ni Mbisuu
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Rank: Member Joined: 6/21/2010 Posts: 345 Location: easto
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hardwood wrote:There is alot we can learn from the Obama story. The mother and stepdad should be allowed to raise the child without interference. Infact Obama only became interested in his roots in his adulthood (and was disappointed by what he learnt about his biological father). Otherwise he grew up as a very happy and successful child raised though raised without any influence or input from his biological dad. Likewise in this case, the daughter should be raised without the biological dad stalking the family and being a nuisance. The daughter can go look for his biological dad in adulthood so as to satisfy her curiosity. So the girl will become an "obamaress" if the father keeps off?. He got good schooling - at Harvard- remember and you can get good education only with money..very rarely with scholarships. These are very different situations and Obama is just one successful child out of millions who get derailed. And we are talking about Kenya here not US. situations in the two countries differ seriously "The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts, while the stupid ones are full of confidence." ― Charles Bukowski
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Rank: Elder Joined: 7/23/2008 Posts: 3,017
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hardwood wrote:There is alot we can learn from the Obama story. The mother and stepdad should be allowed to raise the child without interference. Infact Obama only became interested in his roots in his adulthood (and was disappointed by what he learnt about his biological father). Otherwise he grew up as a very happy and successful child raised though raised without any influence or input from his biological dad. Likewise in this case, the daughter should be raised without the biological dad stalking the family and being a nuisance. The daughter can go look for his biological dad in adulthood so as to satisfy her curiosity. Completely unrelated but I will bite, how then is it that Obama is known as the son of a Kenyan student and not the Indonesian step father. I thought Obama was raised by his grandparents  Infact Obama barely refers to his step father as an influencer anywhere. I think this is a case by case thing, some people do not want to acknowledge past missteps and are happy to bury their heads in the sand and pretend their child is not out there. Others accept and want to correct their past missteps and are making concerted efforts to connect with their children. I know which person I would rather be. "The purpose of bureaucracy is to compensate for incompetence and lack of discipline." James Collins
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 10/29/2008 Posts: 1,566
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At about age 10, Obama left the Step Father's and went to live with his grandparents. From then on, there was almost nil contact with the step dad. His mother kept updating the real Father of the boys development. Credit goes to the Mum - big time,- for the responsible way she handled the situation. Always acting in the best interst of the boy. Isuni yilu yi maa me muyo - ni Mbisuu
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Rank: Elder Joined: 7/23/2008 Posts: 3,017
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hardwood wrote:There is alot we can learn from the Obama story. The mother and stepdad should be allowed to raise the child without interference. Infact Obama only became interested in his roots in his adulthood (and was disappointed by what he learnt about his biological father). Otherwise he grew up as a very happy and successful child raised though raised without any influence or input from his biological dad. Likewise in this case, the daughter should be raised without the biological dad stalking the family and being a nuisance. The daughter can go look for his biological dad in adulthood so as to satisfy her curiosity. @Hardwood, here you just scored an own goal, Obama's case is a testament to the bond between a child and his biological parents. Kama hutaki watoto wako shauri yako. "The purpose of bureaucracy is to compensate for incompetence and lack of discipline." James Collins
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 8/25/2012 Posts: 1,826
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Impunity wrote:Angelica _ann wrote:Impunity wrote:tnai9 wrote:Impunity wrote:
I SAID AND REPEAT FOR 1000 TIMES, YOUR FRIEND IS A NERD.
 nerd nərd/ nouninformal noun: nerd; plural noun: nerds; noun: nurd; plural noun: nurds a foolish or contemptible person who lacks social skills or is boringly studious. "one of those nerds who never asked a girl to dance" synonyms: bore; More informaldork, dweeb, Poindexter, nimrod, geek, drip, loser; techie "the nerds running the world's technology are certainly getting the last laugh" a single-minded expert in a particular technical field. "a computer nerd" Ndio hiyo.  Furthermore: Quote:
con·tempt·i·ble
kənˈtem(p)təb(ə)l/
adjective
deserving contempt; despicable.
"a display of contemptible cowardice"
synonyms:
despicable, detestable, hateful, reprehensible, deplorable, unspeakable, disgraceful, shameful, ignominious, abject, low, mean, cowardly,unworthy, discreditable, petty, worthless, shabby, cheap
the guy is just stupid
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Rank: Elder Joined: 7/28/2015 Posts: 9,562 Location: Rodi Kopany, Homa Bay
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Obi 1 Kanobi wrote:hardwood wrote:There is alot we can learn from the Obama story. The mother and stepdad should be allowed to raise the child without interference. Infact Obama only became interested in his roots in his adulthood (and was disappointed by what he learnt about his biological father). Otherwise he grew up as a very happy and successful child raised though raised without any influence or input from his biological dad. Likewise in this case, the daughter should be raised without the biological dad stalking the family and being a nuisance. The daughter can go look for his biological dad in adulthood so as to satisfy her curiosity. Completely unrelated but I will bite, how then is it that Obama is known as the son of a Kenyan student and not the Indonesian step father. I thought Obama was raised by his grandparents Infact Obama barely refers to his step father as an influencer anywhere.I think this is a case by case thing, some people do not want to acknowledge past missteps and are happy to bury their heads in the sand and pretend their child is not out there. Others accept and want to correct their past missteps and are making concerted efforts to connect with their children. I know which person I would rather be. Seems that you do not know Obama's history. Obama was born in 1961 and shortly after his mother and Obama snr separated. The mother remarried and Obama was raised by this step dad in the US 1963-1966 and then the stepdad moved the family to his native Indonesia where Obama lived 1967 -1970, and then in 1971 Obama went back to the US to attend school and that is when he started living with his grandparents. And yes Obama has alot of praise for his stepdad as can be seen in Obama's memoirs. C+PIn 1963, Obama's mother Dunham met Lolo Soetoro, an Indonesian East–West Center graduate student in geography at the University of Hawaii, and the couple were married on Molokai on March 15, 1965. After two one-year extensions of his J-1 visa, Lolo returned to Indonesia in 1966, followed sixteen months later by his wife and stepson in 1967, with the family initially living in a Menteng Dalam neighborhood in the Tebet subdistrict of south Jakarta, then from 1970 in a wealthier neighborhood in the Menteng subdistrict of central Jakarta. From ages six to ten, Obama attended local Indonesian-language schools: Santo Fransiskus Asisi (St. Francis of Assisi) Catholic School for two years and Besuki Public School for one and a half years, supplemented by English-language Calvert School homeschooling by his mother. During his time in Indonesia, Obama's step-father taught him to be resilient and gave him "a pretty hardheaded assessment of how the world works." http://europe.newsweek.c...-his-father-88011?rm=eu
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barack_Obama
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Rank: Elder Joined: 7/28/2015 Posts: 9,562 Location: Rodi Kopany, Homa Bay
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Ngalaka wrote:At about age 10, Obama left the Step Father's and went to live with his grandparents. From then on, there was almost nil contact with the step dad. His mother kept updating the real Father of the boys development.
Credit goes to the Mum - big time,- for the responsible way she handled the situation.
Always acting in the best interst of the boy. There are always attempts to erase Obama's stepdad from Obama's life history and put all focus on Obama snr. How do you "delete" the man who raised Obama since he was 2yrs and was married to Obama's mother for 15yrs? Fact is that: 1) Obama was born in 1961 and biological parents separated shortly. 2) Obama's step dad met Obama's mother in 1963 and were officially married from 1965 upto 1980 when they divorced. 3) From 1963-1966 the new family lived in the US when step dad was studying. 4) 1966 stepdad took govt job in Indonesia. 5) In 1967 step dad moved his family from US to Indonesia. 6) Obama was enrolled in local Indonesian language school, but mum was doing home schooling in english. 7) 1970 - Obama's sister Maya Soetoro-Ng was born. 8) In 1971-1979 Obama went to US to study in an english school and attended private school and lived with grandparents. Step dad and mum were paying fees. 9) Obama met his biological dad only once in 1971 in the US at the airport when dad was on transit.10) From 1972-1975 Obama's mom and sister returned to the US to undertake masters degree and Obama lived with mum and sis. 11) Mother and sis returned to Indonesia for mum to do field work while Obama remained in US to continue with studies. 12) Mother spent next 20yrs in Indonesia 13) Mum divorced step dad in 1980. 14) Stepdad remarried 1981. 15. Mum got PhD in 1992. 16) Obama mum died 1995.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 10/29/2008 Posts: 1,566
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hardwood wrote:Ngalaka wrote:At about age 10, Obama left the Step Father's and went to live with his grandparents. From then on, there was almost nil contact with the step dad. His mother kept updating the real Father of the boys development.
Credit goes to the Mum - big time,- for the responsible way she handled the situation.
Always acting in the best interst of the boy. There are always attempts to erase Obama's stepdad from Obama's life history and put all focus on Obama snr. How do you "delete" the man who raised Obama since he was 2yrs and was married to Obama's mother for 15yrs? Fact is that: 1) Obama was born in 1961 and biological parents separated shortly. 2) Obama's step dad met Obama's mother in 1963 and were officially married from 1965 upto 1980 when they divorced. 3) From 1963-1966 the new family lived in the US when step dad was studying. 4) 1966 stepdad took govt job in Indonesia. 5) In 1967 step dad moved his family from US to Indonesia. 6) Obama was enrolled in local Indonesian language school, but mum was doing home schooling in english. 7) 1970 - Obama's sister Maya Soetoro-Ng was born. 8) In 1971-1979 Obama went to US to study in an english school and attended private school and lived with grandparents. Step dad and mum were paying fees. 9) Obama met his biological dad only once in 1971 in the US at the airport when dad was on transit.10) From 1972-1975 Obama's mom and sister returned to the US to undertake masters degree and Obama lived with mum and sis. 11) Mother and sis returned to Indonesia for mum to do field work while Obama remained in US to continue with studies. 12) Mother spent next 20yrs in Indonesia 13) Mum divorced step dad in 1980. 14) Stepdad remarried 1981. 15. Mum got PhD in 1992. 16) Obama mum died 1995. Isuni yilu yi maa me muyo - ni Mbisuu
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