Listen to your heart. Decide. Take action. (If I were you, I would take off and never look back especially coz of the violence - believe you me, the kids are also traumatized even if they don't show it).

If you continue living like this, first you will never achieve your full potential because he will shoot and kill all your dreams however beautiful.

You will fall ill of stress and die. Who will take care of your children? From your description, I don't think that guy can take care of a quail. Again, if I were you, I would ruuuuun!

My impression of him, he has baggage that he has not been able to resolve and its reflected in his drinking, violence, irresponsibility etc... Actually he is a very miserable man. If he cannot sort out his baggage too bad. Mc Doba suggests you 2 go for counseling. I doubt he will agree. Just get up and go to Amani on your own.

And you are headed for a very good life. Acknowledging there is a problem and starting to seek help marks the beginning. An year or 2 down the line, you will look back and wonder why and how on earth you lived with so much nonsense.

Chop of the guys thingie and move out! Life and your kids will sort itself out!

What to do at 30? My friend the only thing you can manage to change comfortably is a diaper hii ingine wachana nayao.

Do you have a full length mirror? If you have please tomorrow morning wake up early, take a hot shower, dress to impress, wear your best perfume and stiletto's then look at yourself in the mirror smile or have one hearty laugh take your handbag walk out and never look back.

Every time you feel stressed dress your best and look at yourself in the mirror and smile you will realize how beautiful you are.
God have been merciful to you.

Are you waiting for him to start bashing your babies?

Are you waiting for him to come in at night and throw you out of your bedroom while he orders the house-help onto your matrimonial bed?

1700 hours this evening woman or you are dead.