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Just for laughs...corner
Angelica _ann
#1961 Posted : Thursday, December 12, 2013 6:56:48 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 12/7/2012
Posts: 11,908
washiku wrote:
Always listen to your wife, she always gives sound advice...99% sound 1% advice


Isokei
In the business world, everyone is paid in two coins - cash and experience. Take the experience first; the cash will come later - H Geneen
butterflyke
#1962 Posted : Thursday, December 12, 2013 8:21:33 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 5/1/2010
Posts: 3,024
Location: Hapa
washiku wrote:
Every man is a millionaire, at least by his sperm count. Funny thing is that even these millions still go to women..



sasa hii ndio kusema mwanaume ni sperm?
Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. - Muhammad Ali🐝
kysse
#1963 Posted : Thursday, December 12, 2013 8:24:58 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 1/17/2013
Posts: 4,693
Location: Earth
butterflyke wrote:
washiku wrote:
Every man is a millionaire, at least by his sperm count. Funny thing is that even these millions still go to women..


sasa hii ndio kusema mwanaume ni sperm?


lmao @ butter! that's a new one.
maka
#1964 Posted : Friday, December 13, 2013 1:17:10 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 4/22/2010
Posts: 11,522
Location: Nairobi
symbols wrote:
washiku wrote:
After excavating to a depth of 100 meters last year, Russian scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 1000 years, and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network one thousand years ago.

So, not to be outdone, in the weeks that followed, American scientists dug 200 meters and headlines in the US papers read: "US scientists have found traces of 2000 year old optical fibers, and have concluded that their ancestors already had advanced high-tech digital telephone 1000 years earlier than the Russians."

One week later, the Kenyan newspapers proudly reported the following:
"After digging as deep as 500 meters, Kenyan scientists have found absolutely nothing. They have concluded that 5000 years ago, their ancestors were already using wireless technology.


Wacha tuLaughing out loudly


Hii ni noma...
possunt quia posse videntur
washiku
#1965 Posted : Friday, December 13, 2013 2:31:26 PM
Rank: Chief


Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
#Kenya@50
Tumite haraya ma...
1. Gukurwo magego na rurigi
2. Gukanio kuruta ikombe na thani cia ageni ndiroo
3. gucokia casseti thutha na biro ya BIC
4. Gucuria success card nyumba
5. Gukuithio muhu na mai primary
6. Kuenjwo na magathi
7. Gwitua wina toro nigetha uheo chapo ya mbere
8. Kuoherwo mbeca na ngashibu ndugate
9. Guthambirio nja sato nigetha sunday no kuharukio nguo cia kanitha
10.Gwikinya na kamuti.
11.Gwithamba maguru, na gukinya karuku .
masukuma
#1966 Posted : Friday, December 13, 2013 4:54:58 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 10/4/2006
Posts: 13,821
Location: Nairobi
This goes out to all my luhya friends..we are mourning madiba and NOT matiba
All Mushrooms are edible! Some Mushroom are only edible ONCE!
washiku
#1967 Posted : Friday, December 13, 2013 5:09:26 PM
Rank: Chief


Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
masukuma wrote:
This goes out to all my luhya friends..we are mourning madiba and NOT matiba


Laughing out loudly Lol...Kumbe in plural ni matiba...and my fellow Gikuyus should be told Mandera is not dead, its still a town in Kenya. We are mourning Mandela.
kysse
#1968 Posted : Friday, December 13, 2013 5:14:06 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 1/17/2013
Posts: 4,693
Location: Earth
hahaha! sick.
masukuma
#1969 Posted : Friday, December 13, 2013 5:30:46 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 10/4/2006
Posts: 13,821
Location: Nairobi
washiku wrote:
masukuma wrote:
This goes out to all my luhya friends..we are mourning madiba and NOT matiba


Laughing out loudly Lol...Kumbe in plural ni matiba...and my fellow Gikuyus should be told Mandera is not dead, its still a town in Kenya. We are mourning Mandela.

this is good!!
All Mushrooms are edible! Some Mushroom are only edible ONCE!
Rankaz13
#1970 Posted : Friday, December 13, 2013 9:21:51 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 5/21/2013
Posts: 2,841
Location: Here
washiku wrote:
#Kenya@50
Tumite haraya ma...
1. Gukurwo magego na rurigi
2. Gukanio kuruta ikombe na thani cia ageni ndiroo
3. gucokia casseti thutha na biro ya BIC
4. Gucuria success card nyumba
5. Gukuithio muhu na mai primary
6. Kuenjwo na magathi
7. Gwitua wina toro nigetha uheo chapo ya mbere
8. Kuoherwo mbeca na ngashibu ndugate
9. Guthambirio nja sato nigetha sunday no kuharukio nguo cia kanitha
10.Gwikinya na kamuti.
11.Gwithamba maguru, na gukinya karuku .


smile Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly
Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on.
washiku
#1971 Posted : Saturday, December 14, 2013 11:58:44 PM
Rank: Chief


Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
Man Was Sobbing In A Bar.

His Friend Asked: “aye, Why Are You Crying? ”

He Said: “ My Wife Charged Me ksh. 1000/- For
Sex!”

Friend Said: “ You’re Lucky, She Charges
Others Ksh. 2000/- “

4lourBliss
#1972 Posted : Sunday, December 15, 2013 1:43:25 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 5/9/2013
Posts: 285
Location: hapakule.
washiku wrote:
Man Was Sobbing In A Bar.

His Friend Asked: “aye, Why Are You Crying? ”

He Said: “ My Wife Charged Me ksh. 1000/- For
Sex!”

Friend Said: “ You’re Lucky, She Charges
Others Ksh. 2000/- “



Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly
Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.
4lourBliss
#1973 Posted : Sunday, December 15, 2013 1:45:30 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 5/9/2013
Posts: 285
Location: hapakule.
Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.
ecstacy
#1974 Posted : Sunday, December 15, 2013 1:46:11 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/26/2008
Posts: 4,449
Del
4lourBliss
#1975 Posted : Sunday, December 15, 2013 1:48:27 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 5/9/2013
Posts: 285
Location: hapakule.
Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.
radio
#1976 Posted : Sunday, December 15, 2013 2:15:53 PM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/9/2009
Posts: 2,003
4lourBliss wrote:
washiku wrote:
Man Was Sobbing In A Bar.

His Friend Asked: “aye, Why Are You Crying? ”

He Said: “ My Wife Charged Me ksh. 1000/- For
Sex!”

Friend Said: “ You’re Lucky, She Charges
Others Ksh. 2000/- “



Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly


Laughing out loudlyLaughing out loudlyLaughing out loudly
symbols
#1977 Posted : Sunday, December 15, 2013 9:35:36 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 3/19/2013
Posts: 2,552
An American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked.

Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.

The Mexican replied, "Only a little while."

The American then asked, "Why didn't you stay out longer and catch more fish?"

The Mexican said, "With this I have more than enough to support my family's needs."

The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"

The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life."

The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing; and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat: With the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats. Eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor; eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then Los Angeles and eventually New York where you will run your ever-expanding enterprise."

The Mexican fisherman asked, "But, how long will this all take?"

To which the American replied, "15 to 20 years."

"But what then?" asked the Mexican.

The American laughed and said that's the best part. "When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions."

"Millions?...Then what?"

The American said, "Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos."
washiku
#1978 Posted : Monday, December 16, 2013 10:16:04 AM
Rank: Chief


Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
Police ................Knock knock knock
Onyango ..........Who's that?
Police.................police open up!...
Onyango...........what do u want?
Police ................to talk!
Onyango............how many are you?
Police. ...............two
Onyango ...........talk to each other
washiku
#1979 Posted : Monday, December 16, 2013 10:23:45 AM
Rank: Chief


Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
Overheard: Wakamba wanashinda na vest juu ni vestive season.
Rankaz13
#1980 Posted : Monday, December 16, 2013 9:25:41 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 5/21/2013
Posts: 2,841
Location: Here
washiku wrote:
Police ................Knock knock knock
Onyango ..........Who's that?
Police.................police open up!...
Onyango...........what do u want?
Police ................to talk!
Onyango............how many are you?
Police. ...............two
Onyango ...........talk to each other



Applause Applause Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly
Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on.
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