wazua Sat, May 9, 2026
Welcome Guest Search | Active Topics | Log In

6 Pages<12345>»
How do you kill a Nairobi cat??
Muriel
#21 Posted : Tuesday, November 26, 2013 10:27:08 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 11/19/2009
Posts: 3,142
seppuku wrote:
tycho wrote:
seppuku wrote:
alma wrote:
seppuku wrote:
Swenani wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
Simple.

Some wild cats have mingled with some ex-domesticated cats abandoned by some neighbor and now the place is run by freaking cats.

In record time, generation has given birth to generation and it seems this is even attracting some more heated alley cats that cry and $hit wherever they please not to mention hop into the home from whatever available opening. NKT

Nothing seems to get them away.

I am pro-cat life and all but heck it has reached unbearable levels!! How do you kill a cat??


Trap them in a sack and tie it tightly then drive 100Kms away and dump them there without untying the sack


I agree with you up to the word tightly. Why waste precious petrol doing that? Get a heavy iron bar or mallet and bring in down on the offender's skull. Works like magic. At least it did when I was a young boy. Only problem it needs you to be a young boy. Kama wewe iko na 12 year old son you can enlist his help. He will likely find the procedure very entertaining.


He will end up being a serial killer.


@alma, I am NOT a serial killer. smile


Would you know if you were one?

@ecstasy, you seem to be at war. Man versus cat; or so it seems. As long as the Man isn't the cat, then 'angst' must rise.

And if the cat is away then rats will rule.

So I suggest you keep the cats under a nyumba kumi initiative. Make the cats an army against rats, train them to serve you in special communal tasks like using their circus skills to operate machines and contraptions whose range is as wide as you can imagine. You could do wonders with such an untapped resource.

But if everything else fails, eat them.





Tycho tycho tycho tycho! You are beyond me.


Laugh

Laugh

Laugh.
jaggernaut
#22 Posted : Tuesday, November 26, 2013 10:36:24 AM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 10/9/2008
Posts: 5,389
It is the city council's job to control stray animals, so just give them a call. They shouldn't charge anything for this since they are required by law to control stray animals in all areas within their jurisdiction to safeguard public health.
washiku
#23 Posted : Tuesday, November 26, 2013 10:51:39 AM
Rank: Chief

Joined: 5/9/2007
Posts: 13,095
Drobos fly wrote:
Very very simple! start bee keeping in your neighbor's place and tie a long rope to rock the bee hives. When the cat legion comes around rock the bees to "sleep" from a distance. The memory associated with your neighbor's place to the survivors will last weigh past nine lives!


Magigi
#24 Posted : Tuesday, November 26, 2013 11:00:31 AM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 3/31/2008
Posts: 7,081
Location: Kenya
ecstacy wrote:
Simple.

Some wild cats have mingled with some ex-domesticated cats abandoned by some neighbor and now the place is run by freaking cats.

In record time, generation has given birth to generation and it seems this is even attracting some more heated alley cats that cry and $hit wherever they please not to mention hop into the home from whatever available opening. NKT

Nothing seems to get them away.

I am pro-cat life and all but heck it has reached unbearable levels!! How do you kill a cat??

Buy several hooks, attach a string to each of them. Fix a piece of meat on each of them. Tether the strings somewhere. Invite the cats in your house for a party!
Jump-steady
#25 Posted : Tuesday, November 26, 2013 11:09:29 AM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 12/1/2008
Posts: 1,098
tycho wrote:
seppuku wrote:
alma wrote:
seppuku wrote:
Swenani wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
Simple.

Some wild cats have mingled with some ex-domesticated cats abandoned by some neighbor and now the place is run by freaking cats.

In record time, generation has given birth to generation and it seems this is even attracting some more heated alley cats that cry and $hit wherever they please not to mention hop into the home from whatever available opening. NKT

Nothing seems to get them away.

I am pro-cat life and all but heck it has reached unbearable levels!! How do you kill a cat??


Trap them in a sack and tie it tightly then drive 100Kms away and dump them there without untying the sack


I agree with you up to the word tightly. Why waste precious petrol doing that? Get a heavy iron bar or mallet and bring in down on the offender's skull. Works like magic. At least it did when I was a young boy. Only problem it needs you to be a young boy. Kama wewe iko na 12 year old son you can enlist his help. He will likely find the procedure very entertaining.


He will end up being a serial killer.


@alma, I am NOT a serial killer. smile


Would you know if you were one?

@ecstasy, you seem to be at war. Man versus cat; or so it seems. As long as the Man isn't the cat, then 'angst' must rise.

And if the cat is away then rats will rule.

So I suggest you keep the cats under a nyumba kumi initiative. Make the cats an army against rats, train them to serve you in special communal tasks like using their circus skills to operate machines and contraptions whose range is as wide as you can imagine. You could do wonders with such an untapped resource.

But if everything else fails, eat them.






Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly

Paka choma will do. @ecstacy, prepare one and invite @Tycho and their numbers will beging to go downsmile
Drobos fly
#26 Posted : Tuesday, November 26, 2013 11:22:09 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 4/24/2012
Posts: 331
Location: Vantage point
washiku wrote:
Drobos fly wrote:
Very very simple! start bee keeping in your neighbor's place and tie a long rope to rock the bee hives. When the cat legion comes around rock the bees to "sleep" from a distance. The memory associated with your neighbor's place to the survivors will last weigh past nine lives!




The beauty about these "hired assassins" is that they don't care about how many assassins need to go after a cat to make it extinct. Both victor and surviving victim have memories to share down their generations for the sake of survival, so it eliminates any alshabab cats from attempting to explode a family of baby cats in ecstacy's neighborhood. There is endless ammo so long as the queen bee is well taken care (a cup of sugared water by ecstacy near the beehives). It isn't a problem for a cat to try and get to the queen bee because they would need to survive a million shots of puffing and numbing poison which they can't. Cats are not the only animals that will dread that spot anything even geckos will fear!

The bees also don't have a conscience unlike you, they are not bound by any law system unlike you. At the end of the ordeal ecstacy will be rewarded with honey by the bees if ecstacy cares to carefully pay them a visit. There death can be perceived as life balancing the odds of survival.

Think of it as the perfect "accomplice" for the crime smile

Ecstacy can recoup his invested money by selling the honey anyway.. win win win situation!
Siringi
#27 Posted : Tuesday, November 26, 2013 11:51:29 AM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 6/8/2013
Posts: 2,517
Sad Sad smile Laughing out loudlysmile Laughing out loudly
am reporting this thread and all the contributors to KSPCA for imagining cruelty to animals Shame on you Shame on you
"😖😡KQ makes money for everyone except the shareholder 😏😏 " overheard in Wazua
Buster
#28 Posted : Tuesday, November 26, 2013 12:13:44 PM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 5/17/2007
Posts: 1,345
alma wrote:
seppuku wrote:
Swenani wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
Simple.

Some wild cats have mingled with some ex-domesticated cats abandoned by some neighbor and now the place is run by freaking cats.

In record time, generation has given birth to generation and it seems this is even attracting some more heated alley cats that cry and $hit wherever they please not to mention hop into the home from whatever available opening. NKT

Nothing seems to get them away.

I am pro-cat life and all but heck it has reached unbearable levels!! How do you kill a cat??


Trap them in a sack and tie it tightly then drive 100Kms away and dump them there without untying the sack


I agree with you up to the word tightly. Why waste precious petrol doing that? Get a heavy iron bar or mallet and bring in down on the offender's skull. Works like magic. At least it did when I was a young boy. Only problem it needs you to be a young boy. Kama wewe iko na 12 year old son you can enlist his help. He will likely find the procedure very entertaining.


He will end up being a serial killer.

Kweli kabisa. This is how serial killers start. Would not want to be seppuku's neighbour.
seppuku
#29 Posted : Tuesday, November 26, 2013 12:54:21 PM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 5/11/2010
Posts: 918
Buster wrote:
alma wrote:
seppuku wrote:
Swenani wrote:
ecstacy wrote:
Simple.

Some wild cats have mingled with some ex-domesticated cats abandoned by some neighbor and now the place is run by freaking cats.

In record time, generation has given birth to generation and it seems this is even attracting some more heated alley cats that cry and $hit wherever they please not to mention hop into the home from whatever available opening. NKT

Nothing seems to get them away.

I am pro-cat life and all but heck it has reached unbearable levels!! How do you kill a cat??


Trap them in a sack and tie it tightly then drive 100Kms away and dump them there without untying the sack


I agree with you up to the word tightly. Why waste precious petrol doing that? Get a heavy iron bar or mallet and bring in down on the offender's skull. Works like magic. At least it did when I was a young boy. Only problem it needs you to be a young boy. Kama wewe iko na 12 year old son you can enlist his help. He will likely find the procedure very entertaining.


He will end up being a serial killer.

Kweli kabisa. This is how serial killers start. Would not want to be seppuku's neighbour.


Maybe you are already. Be VERY afraid.
Learn first to treat your time as you would your money, then treat your money as you do your time.
jguru
#30 Posted : Tuesday, November 26, 2013 1:06:13 PM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 10/25/2007
Posts: 1,574
iller wrote:
Just round them up and take them to KSPCA


There's your answer right there.

The cats will be caught by an experienced Vet Surgeon and placed in individual kennels (In respect of Animal Rights), taken to their premises, vaccinated, scented shampoo baths twice a day, meals (fish in jelly) thrice a day, recreational toys, pedicures once a month, feather cushion for naps etc. In short, they will live a life of luxury.

Then they will breed the cats with an Asian leopard, a Russian blue or a Sphynx and the kittens will be sold off for 5k each.

smile
Set out to correct the world's wrongs and you will most certainly wind up adding to them.
6 Pages<12345>»
Forum Jump  
You cannot post new topics in this forum.
You cannot reply to topics in this forum.
You cannot delete your posts in this forum.
You cannot edit your posts in this forum.
You cannot create polls in this forum.
You cannot vote in polls in this forum.

Copyright © 2026 Wazua.co.ke. All Rights Reserved.