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A letter from Kenyans Abroad - by mkawasi mcharo-Hall
vky
#21 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 12:25:32 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 6/17/2010
Posts: 572
digitek1 wrote:
murchr wrote:
kingfisher wrote:
summarize in not more than 20 words....


She says we stink and we should not JUST CLEAN OUR ASS HOLE BUT THE WHOLE ASS

Liar at least diaspora have experience after cleaning grizzly mzungu asses day in day out

Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly what a term
'One headache for famous medieval holy people was that someone might murder you to acquire your body parts for the relics trade'
CLK
#22 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 1:04:52 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 4/1/2009
Posts: 846
Lolest! wrote:
On the flipside, I pity these fellows esp those in the Americas and Euroope when they come home. The whole village and entire clan expects something from them. Very sad. How do we expect these fellows to come home if we are just waiting to pounce on them? It saddens me that a Kenyan living in Mombasa whose shags is Maua is not expected to give goodies however rich he is but the guy who washes tushosho in Boston is expected to be a Santa claus!


Tabia mbaya, sana let someone mention you stepped out of the country even for a day, and you will hear questions 'uliniletea nini?' you wonder if they give things for free huko majuu.
However hao wa majuu pia they come and show off, i mean if you want to party everyday of the week, that shows you have more than you need, so dont blame me nikiomba cologne...
CLK
#23 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 1:08:01 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 4/1/2009
Posts: 846
The deodorant thing is however so true, you will find even people in the office stinking....
masukuma
#24 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 1:31:10 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 10/4/2006
Posts: 13,821
Location: Nairobi
as someone who has worked abroad I am with the Diasporans on accents. its true! to us HEART, HURT, HAT, HUT all sound the same! some Americans would think you are talking about HOT. HEARD, HARD, HERD, HAD to us all sound the same and to outsiders they are not. COAT and COURT as well. so the accent we accuse them of having is actually the ability to learn how to communicate... WATER being pronounced as WARRRER. TWITTER as TWIRRA, BETTY as BERRRY e.t.c. so it happens.

The one thing that I don't support is the 'forgetting to speak' a local dialect or complaining on the 'stench' of us africans. Even us town folk get the same experience when we go upcountry. We get our grandparents and relatives who have a smoky odour or something else of they are cattle farmers. We don't complain. we hug them and enjoy. When it is required that you go to the loo and you find its a pit latrine located at a lonely corner of the shamba with offcuts used as walls (not to mention rays of sunlight that beam through the intersections). WE DON'T ZUSHA - we simply do our business and go!! When you are stuck in a matt from Nyandarua you get whiffs of all types of smells but olfactory fatigue steps in to sort you out! we don't complain! we understand that THIS IS KENYA!
All Mushrooms are edible! Some Mushroom are only edible ONCE!
Iganamagana
#25 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 1:59:05 PM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 3/27/2009
Posts: 1,437
CLK wrote:
The deodorant thing is however so true, you will find even people in the office stinking....


Buy them some birthday gift package that includes deodorant. They will figure out what to do with it.
poundfoolish
#26 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 2:16:03 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 12/2/2009
Posts: 2,458
Location: Nairobi
masukuma wrote:
as someone who has worked abroad I am with the Diasporans on accents. its true! to us HEART, HURT, HAT, HUT all sound the same! some Americans would think you are talking about HOT. HEARD, HARD, HERD, HAD to us all sound the same and to outsiders they are not. COAT and COURT as well. so the accent we accuse them of having is actually the ability to learn how to communicate... WATER being pronounced as WARRRER. TWITTER as TWIRRA, BETTY as BERRRY e.t.c. so it happens.

The one thing that I don't support is the 'forgetting to speak' a local dialect or complaining on the 'stench' of us africans. Even us town folk get the same experience when we go upcountry. We get our grandparents and relatives who have a smoky odour or something else of they are cattle farmers. We don't complain. we hug them and enjoy. When it is required that you go to the loo and you find its a pit latrine located at a lonely corner of the shamba with offcuts used as walls (not to mention rays of sunlight that beam through the intersections). WE DON'T ZUSHA - we simply do our business and go!! When you are stuck in a matt from Nyandarua you get whiffs of all types of smells but olfactory fatigue steps in to sort you out! we don't complain! we understand that THIS IS KENYA!


Are you sure?
In the offices i hear Nairobians from Buru/Shuge and the likes complaining about guys from Ololo (and Kibich) and such places of not taking showers..
You've never heard stuff like.. 'Men should learn to use deos' 'this is the 21st century.. hata sabuni mtu hawezi pata' and the usual attack on Somalis and their colognes?

tuwache kuwa hivyo. the same things we accuse the diaspora we practice on those we think lesser...
masukuma
#27 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 2:18:28 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 10/4/2006
Posts: 13,821
Location: Nairobi
poundfoolish wrote:
masukuma wrote:
as someone who has worked abroad I am with the Diasporans on accents. its true! to us HEART, HURT, HAT, HUT all sound the same! some Americans would think you are talking about HOT. HEARD, HARD, HERD, HAD to us all sound the same and to outsiders they are not. COAT and COURT as well. so the accent we accuse them of having is actually the ability to learn how to communicate... WATER being pronounced as WARRRER. TWITTER as TWIRRA, BETTY as BERRRY e.t.c. so it happens.

The one thing that I don't support is the 'forgetting to speak' a local dialect or complaining on the 'stench' of us africans. Even us town folk get the same experience when we go upcountry. We get our grandparents and relatives who have a smoky odour or something else of they are cattle farmers. We don't complain. we hug them and enjoy. When it is required that you go to the loo and you find its a pit latrine located at a lonely corner of the shamba with offcuts used as walls (not to mention rays of sunlight that beam through the intersections). WE DON'T ZUSHA - we simply do our business and go!! When you are stuck in a matt from Nyandarua you get whiffs of all types of smells but olfactory fatigue steps in to sort you out! we don't complain! we understand that THIS IS KENYA!


Are you sure?
In the offices i hear Nairobians from Buru/Shuge and the likes complaining about guys from Ololo (and Kibich) and such places of not taking showers..
You've never heard stuff like.. 'Men should learn to use deos' 'this is the 21st century.. hata sabuni mtu hawezi pata' and the usual attack on Somalis and their colognes?

tuwache kuwa hivyo. the same things we accuse the diaspora we practice on those we think lesser...

those are the characters who when they get an opportunity abroad - come back to give us all a hard time!
All Mushrooms are edible! Some Mushroom are only edible ONCE!
nostoppingthis
#28 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 3:15:37 PM
Rank: Chief


Joined: 8/24/2009
Posts: 5,909
Location: Nairobi
chemos
#29 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 3:22:56 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 11/28/2006
Posts: 1,799
Mwanaume ni JASHO....!!!!
poundfoolish
#30 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 3:23:00 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 12/2/2009
Posts: 2,458
Location: Nairobi
masukuma wrote:
poundfoolish wrote:
masukuma wrote:
as someone who has worked abroad I am with the Diasporans on accents. its true! to us HEART, HURT, HAT, HUT all sound the same! some Americans would think you are talking about HOT. HEARD, HARD, HERD, HAD to us all sound the same and to outsiders they are not. COAT and COURT as well. so the accent we accuse them of having is actually the ability to learn how to communicate... WATER being pronounced as WARRRER. TWITTER as TWIRRA, BETTY as BERRRY e.t.c. so it happens.

The one thing that I don't support is the 'forgetting to speak' a local dialect or complaining on the 'stench' of us africans. Even us town folk get the same experience when we go upcountry. We get our grandparents and relatives who have a smoky odour or something else of they are cattle farmers. We don't complain. we hug them and enjoy. When it is required that you go to the loo and you find its a pit latrine located at a lonely corner of the shamba with offcuts used as walls (not to mention rays of sunlight that beam through the intersections). WE DON'T ZUSHA - we simply do our business and go!! When you are stuck in a matt from Nyandarua you get whiffs of all types of smells but olfactory fatigue steps in to sort you out! we don't complain! we understand that THIS IS KENYA!


Are you sure?
In the offices i hear Nairobians from Buru/Shuge and the likes complaining about guys from Ololo (and Kibich) and such places of not taking showers..
You've never heard stuff like.. 'Men should learn to use deos' 'this is the 21st century.. hata sabuni mtu hawezi pata' and the usual attack on Somalis and their colognes?

tuwache kuwa hivyo. the same things we accuse the diaspora we practice on those we think lesser...

those are the characters who when they get an opportunity abroad - come back to give us all a hard time!


remember they got an opportunity from the village as well...
kingfisher
#31 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 4:06:55 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 4/9/2008
Posts: 2,824
Quote:

Wow! someone has been put in

Wow! someone has been put in their place. They hate diaspora guys because they haven't got a chance to come. He can't even pass a visa interview anyway.


That's from a diaspora guy!!!

Are these the interviews where they had to stripe? How can one be proud of that?? Bure kabisa!!!
When I have money, I get rid of it quickly, lest it find a way into my heart.
kiterunner
#32 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 4:19:37 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 7/9/2011
Posts: 730
Location: Nairobi
i read a lot of slightly disguised jealousy in many of the comments in the two blog posts Biko and Mkwasi. Live and let live
our goals are best achieved indirectly
keraka
#33 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 4:51:21 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 2/24/2010
Posts: 637
Location: Nairobi
Mon, 08/26/2013 08:27PM -0400
#5
M&#039;Ibara's picture
Regina Njogu

Good piece Mkawasi. What annoys me is that Kenyans at home are ever so eager to ask for and receive our dollars, euross and yens, but then trash the very jobs we do to earn the mulla. As for creating time for us, when they visit us abroad, God forbid if you asked them to take a taxi from the airport coz you are busy at work, they would mobilize the whole village elders to pronounce a curse on you!. Fair is fair - if I visit Kenya and you have no time for me, you dare not ask me to send you that invitation letter or host you when you visit coz I will not have time for you either! As for the biting cold, there is no need to pity us for it. We are used to it!. and by the way, the sun does also shine in Northern Ireland, US and all of Europe!!!

What this character does not know is that guys with real chums are right here in Kenya and they are many for that matter.Having a return air ticket and some little cash to spend locally should not make you think you have arrived.

Applause Applause Applause Applause My Case;
1.Twice in the last two years an Uncle of mine and his family visited from US to attend a burial.I arranged for airport pick up,and provided accommodation on arrival and a car which was used for 3 weeks as i made alternative travel arrangements for my self and family.That car was not serviced on return coz these peeps thought they were doing me a favor by using my car.
2.On the few occasions i have had a chance to visit the west on my employers sponsorship,I ensure i strictly stay in a hotel just to avoid the above kind of stupid talk.
3.Yes some of us are happy here, we cant all ship out of our country just because life is nice on the other side.
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.
Kratos
#34 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 7:33:00 PM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 1,694
masukuma wrote:
as someone who has worked abroad I am with the Diasporans on accents. its true! to us HEART, HURT, HAT, HUT all sound the same! some Americans would think you are talking about HOT. HEARD, HARD, HERD, HAD to us all sound the same and to outsiders they are not. COAT and COURT as well. so the accent we accuse them of having is actually the ability to learn how to communicate... WATER being pronounced as WARRRER. TWITTER as TWIRRA, BETTY as BERRRY e.t.c. so it happens.

The one thing that I don't support is the 'forgetting to speak' a local dialect or complaining on the 'stench' of us africans. Even us town folk get the same experience when we go upcountry. We get our grandparents and relatives who have a smoky odour or something else of they are cattle farmers. We don't complain. we hug them and enjoy. When it is required that you go to the loo and you find its a pit latrine located at a lonely corner of the shamba with offcuts used as walls (not to mention rays of sunlight that beam through the intersections). WE DON'T ZUSHA - we simply do our business and go!! When you are stuck in a matt from Nyandarua you get whiffs of all types of smells but olfactory fatigue steps in to sort you out! we don't complain! we understand that THIS IS KENYA!


Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Applause Applause Applause Applause Just had to log in for this! Well put. When using the pit latrines with those "rays of sunlight" you often think someone on the outside can see you doing your thing Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly

“People will believe a big lie sooner than a little one, and if you repeat it frequently enough, people will sooner or later believe it.” ― Walter C. Langer
murchr
#35 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 7:40:31 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 2/26/2012
Posts: 15,980
nostoppingthis wrote:


You must be very slow
"There are only two emotions in the market, hope & fear. The problem is you hope when you should fear & fear when you should hope: - Jesse Livermore
.
dunkang
#36 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 9:03:30 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 6/2/2011
Posts: 4,818
Location: -1.2107, 36.8831
nostoppingthis wrote:

Boss, si uko nyuma!
Receive with simplicity everything that happens to you.” ― Rashi

Wakanyugi
#37 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 9:15:07 PM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 7/3/2007
Posts: 1,634
masukuma wrote:
he has not addressed the issue of...


My ten comments:

1. Mkawasi is a 'she'

2. I knew most people would get stuck on that 'stinking' part.

3. Must have hit a nerve, maybe in the armpit?

4. I am surprised people claim they didn't read her long rant, yet somehow read the stinky part buried in the nth paragraph

5. It is said that if you want to hide something from a Kenyan, put it in a book...need I say more?

6. Biko held up a mirror to the collective reality that we call, Kenyan.

7. Mkawasi did the same.

8. Both tell some inconvenient truths that we would prefer not to confront.

9. Both say, 'this is what we, Kenyans, are.'

10. Get over it.


"The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth." (Niels Bohr)
radio
#38 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 9:52:17 PM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/9/2009
Posts: 2,003
masukuma wrote:
as someone who has worked abroad I am with the Diasporans on accents. its true! to us HEART, HURT, HAT, HUT all sound the same! some Americans would think you are talking about HOT. HEARD, HARD, HERD, HAD to us all sound the same and to outsiders they are not. COAT and COURT as well. so the accent we accuse them of having is actually the ability to learn how to communicate... WATER being pronounced as WARRRER. TWITTER as TWIRRA, BETTY as BERRRY e.t.c. so it happens.

The one thing that I don't support is the 'forgetting to speak' a local dialect or complaining on the 'stench' of us africans. Even us town folk get the same experience when we go upcountry. We get our grandparents and relatives who have a smoky odour or something else of they are cattle farmers. We don't complain. we hug them and enjoy. When it is required that you go to the loo and you find its a pit latrine located at a lonely corner of the shamba with offcuts used as walls (not to mention rays of sunlight that beam through the intersections). WE DON'T ZUSHA - we simply do our business and go!! When you are stuck in a matt from Nyandarua you get whiffs of all types of smells but olfactory fatigue steps in to sort you out! we don't complain! we understand that THIS IS KENYA!


M'boss, you mean Nyandaruans are dirty!Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you We demand an apology! ABK!
masukuma
#39 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 10:01:42 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 10/4/2006
Posts: 13,821
Location: Nairobi
radio wrote:
masukuma wrote:
as someone who has worked abroad I am with the Diasporans on accents. its true! to us HEART, HURT, HAT, HUT all sound the same! some Americans would think you are talking about HOT. HEARD, HARD, HERD, HAD to us all sound the same and to outsiders they are not. COAT and COURT as well. so the accent we accuse them of having is actually the ability to learn how to communicate... WATER being pronounced as WARRRER. TWITTER as TWIRRA, BETTY as BERRRY e.t.c. so it happens.

The one thing that I don't support is the 'forgetting to speak' a local dialect or complaining on the 'stench' of us africans. Even us town folk get the same experience when we go upcountry. We get our grandparents and relatives who have a smoky odour or something else of they are cattle farmers. We don't complain. we hug them and enjoy. When it is required that you go to the loo and you find its a pit latrine located at a lonely corner of the shamba with offcuts used as walls (not to mention rays of sunlight that beam through the intersections). WE DON'T ZUSHA - we simply do our business and go!! When you are stuck in a matt from Nyandarua you get whiffs of all types of smells but olfactory fatigue steps in to sort you out! we don't complain! we understand that THIS IS KENYA!


M'boss, you mean Nyandaruans are dirty!Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you We demand an apology! ABK!

it was just a random shags I picked..... tuliza boli and enjoy.
All Mushrooms are edible! Some Mushroom are only edible ONCE!
Rollout
#40 Posted : Tuesday, August 27, 2013 10:19:53 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 4/26/2011
Posts: 759
Atleast we all agree, Kenyans in Kenya smell like goats!
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