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Help! She refuses to sleep in own bedroom
Rank: Veteran Joined: 12/4/2009 Posts: 1,982 Location: matano manne
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muchcr, will try that, in the meantime will Sossion mpaka ajue there are no options.
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Rank: Member Joined: 4/1/2009 Posts: 846
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Rank: Member Joined: 2/27/2011 Posts: 518
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My experience was closer to ngogoyo's. primelet was on our bed till around 6 months. She was then moved to her own cot IN our bedroom. On her first birthday she was out and into the house help's bedroom. Our struggle was more in begging and cuddling her to sleep. But a time came when her mum went out of the country for a month. I would just switch off the light everyday at 9 pm. She would protest and protest but eventually she got the flow.
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Rank: Member Joined: 4/1/2009 Posts: 846
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KulaRaha wrote:There is no solution but the hard one...let her cry for 2 to 3 days and she will adjust. I had to do it to my older one, broke my heart, but he managed. Growing up, my dad used to work away from home, being the last born i had the opportunity to enjoy sleeping with my mum, you can imagine what would happen, when this stranger showed up every three months and i was kicked out of that bed. I was never happy whenever my dad was around when it came to bedtime.... Now i grew up somewhere where horror stories about witches and wizards and night runners were common, this is the reason i never wanted to sleep in my room. My reason for not wanting to sleep in my bed was i was scared. Find out why your daughter does not want to sleep in her bed, is she scared of something or she is just attached to that bed, maybe she feels more secure there...What Muheani said is what my mum devised, she would trick me, let me doze off in her bed and ship me to my bed later on, a couple of times i would wake up and scream in the middle of the night on discovering i was sleeping alone, my mum would come tell me it was okay, there was no one to harm me, at times she would get into my bed only to leave once i dozed off again, eventually i woke up in the morning in my room alone so many times and realized there were other things to worry about than the witches.... all the best, breaks my heart nikiskia mtoto analia, hata wa neighbor, i could call cradle on you...
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 9/19/2011 Posts: 1,694
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Kumbe we are many "suffering" in silence. Kratolet #2 has the same problem. He is slightly over 3 years old. Initially he used to sleep in his own cot after 6 months, then we moved him to another room. Then i got a job requiring travel and that was the start of it. I didn't mind it so much since he would keep the mum company. He even wakes up at 2 or 3 am and comes knocking having walked all the way saying things like please nifungulie tuu......then if no response he starts crying....nothing breaks my heart like hearing him cry. I think the advise for taking him to his bed after he sleeps again works but also is tiresome, imagine waiting for him to sleep again then taking him back! We should form a chama! “People will believe a big lie sooner than a little one, and if you repeat it frequently enough, people will sooner or later believe it.” ― Walter C. Langer
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/26/2012 Posts: 15,980
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Kratos wrote:Kumbe we are many "suffering" in silence. Kratolet #2 has the same problem. He is slightly over 3 years old. Initially he used to sleep in his own cot after 6 months, then we moved him to another room. Then i got a job requiring travel and that was the start of it. I didn't mind it so much since he would keep the mum company. He even wakes up at 2 or 3 am and comes knocking having walked all the way saying things like please nifungulie tuu......then if no response he starts crying....nothing breaks my heart like hearing him cry. I think the advise for taking him to his bed after he sleeps again works but also is tiresome, imagine waiting for him to sleep again then taking him back! We should form a chama! "There are only two emotions in the market, hope & fear. The problem is you hope when you should fear & fear when you should hope: - Jesse Livermore .
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Rank: Elder Joined: 7/11/2012 Posts: 5,222
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Start sleeping in her bed, to show her its ok. I'm guessing she'll follow you. When eventually(a week or two) you move back, the ensuing ndrama won't be as much.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/19/2010 Posts: 3,504 Location: Uganda
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Mimi pia iko ndani ya hii sida. naomba sirkal aingie kati. conjugals have to wait till he is deep asleep lakini si hoja. kungoja nayo! ! punda amecheka
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Rank: Member Joined: 10/8/2010 Posts: 763 Location: Intersection
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Kratos wrote:Kumbe we are many "suffering" in silence. Kratolet #2 has the same problem. He is slightly over 3 years old. Initially he used to sleep in his own cot after 6 months, then we moved him to another room. Then i got a job requiring travel and that was the start of it. I didn't mind it so much since he would keep the mum company. He even wakes up at 2 or 3 am and comes knocking having walked all the way saying things like please nifungulie tuu......then if no response he starts crying....nothing breaks my heart like hearing him cry. I think the advise for taking him to his bed after he sleeps again works but also is tiresome, imagine waiting for him to sleep again then taking him back! We should form a chama!
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Rank: Elder Joined: 10/4/2006 Posts: 13,821 Location: Nairobi
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murchr wrote:Decorate that room in a way that makes her want to live there. interesting idea! when I was younger I used to diss those "sissy" parents in Nanny 911, i used to think - what is wrong with these people? Kumbe the proof of the pudding is in the eating... its heart breaking, hard and plus it takes place during ungodly hours of the night when there is almost no will to fight with a screaming 2 year old. All Mushrooms are edible! Some Mushroom are only edible ONCE!
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Rank: Elder Joined: 4/22/2010 Posts: 11,522 Location: Nairobi
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danas10 wrote:Kratos wrote:Kumbe we are many "suffering" in silence. Kratolet #2 has the same problem. He is slightly over 3 years old. Initially he used to sleep in his own cot after 6 months, then we moved him to another room. Then i got a job requiring travel and that was the start of it. I didn't mind it so much since he would keep the mum company. He even wakes up at 2 or 3 am and comes knocking having walked all the way saying things like please nifungulie tuu......then if no response he starts crying....nothing breaks my heart like hearing him cry. I think the advise for taking him to his bed after he sleeps again works but also is tiresome, imagine waiting for him to sleep again then taking him back! We should form a chama! Man see i have burst out laughing..."please nifungulie" thats funny... possunt quia posse videntur
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 11/20/2009 Posts: 1,402
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After The Period Of Him Dozzing Off In My Bed, Shipped To His, Wakes up Yelling in His Bed, Is Picked, Dozzes Off, Back To His Bed... That Was Very Trying (I Think Sometime I Used To Walk Around Eyes Closed Asleep)
The Next phase Was Him Waking Up Around 3.30am N shouting At The Top Of His Voice...dadiiiiii.... Off I Go N The Guy Says..nifunike..
I Then Noticed our Jogoo wud wika Just Before He Called Out...We Ate Him.
Thayu (Peace) Nayo After The Jogoo Was No More!
Moral Of The Story...no Noise When Baby Starts To Get The Hung Of It
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Rank: Elder Joined: 1/17/2013 Posts: 4,693 Location: Earth
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danas10 wrote:Kratos wrote:Kumbe we are many "suffering" in silence. Kratolet #2 has the same problem. He is slightly over 3 years old. Initially he used to sleep in his own cot after 6 months, then we moved him to another room. Then i got a job requiring travel and that was the start of it. I didn't mind it so much since he would keep the mum company. He even wakes up at 2 or 3 am and comes knocking having walked all the way saying things like please nifungulie tuu......then if no response he starts crying....nothing breaks my heart like hearing him cry. I think the advise for taking him to his bed after he sleeps again works but also is tiresome, imagine waiting for him to sleep again then taking him back! We should form a chama! This would break my heart too and make me lose sleep. Kids can play psychological games and drive you nuts but each stage of a kids life has the word 'let go'. '2 and a half,needs the bro to play with her now.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 7/11/2012 Posts: 5,222
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Muheani wrote:After The Period Of Him Dozzing Off In My Bed, Shipped To His, Wakes up Yelling in His Bed, Is Picked, Dozzes Off, Back To His Bed... That Was Very Trying (I Think Sometime I Used To Walk Around Eyes Closed Asleep)
The Next phase Was Him Waking Up Around 3.30am N shouting At The Top Of His Voice...dadiiiiii.... Off I Go N The Guy Says..nifunike..
I Then Noticed our Jogoo wud wika Just Before He Called Out...We Ate Him.
Thayu (Peace) Nayo After The Jogoo Was No More!
Moral Of The Story...no Noise When Baby Starts To Get The Hung Of It ...ili iwe funzo kwa jogoo wengine..
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Rank: Elder Joined: 3/2/2009 Posts: 26,328 Location: Masada
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Mukiri wrote:Muheani wrote:After The Period Of Him Dozzing Off In My Bed, Shipped To His, Wakes up Yelling in His Bed, Is Picked, Dozzes Off, Back To His Bed... That Was Very Trying (I Think Sometime I Used To Walk Around Eyes Closed Asleep)
The Next phase Was Him Waking Up Around 3.30am N shouting At The Top Of His Voice...dadiiiiii.... Off I Go N The Guy Says..nifunike..
I Then Noticed our Jogoo wud wika Just Before He Called Out...We Ate Him.
Thayu (Peace) Nayo After The Jogoo Was No More!
Moral Of The Story...no Noise When Baby Starts To Get The Hung Of It ...ili iwe funzo kwa jogoo wengine.. Portfolio: Sold You know you've made it when you get a parking space for your yatcht.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/27/2008 Posts: 4,114
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Our kids never sleep in our bed at all. Right from birth, they sleep in their own cot. When they wake up in the middle of the night, I get up [wife is usually too fatigued, especially in first few months after birth], pick the kid and hand over to wife for breastfeeding...or simply rock back to sleep. Time to move out of our room comes when the kid settles into an all-night sleep routine. We've never had a problem with that. We are now on number 3 and he will be heading out of out bedroom in a few months time. I don't expect any problems. Nothing is real unless it can be named; nothing has value unless it can be sold; money is worthless unless you spend it.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 6/27/2008 Posts: 4,114
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murchr wrote:Decorate that room in a way that makes her want to live there. Yeah right! Adults have no clue what makes babies happy. Have you ever noticed that a baby will be more interested in a carton box than the toy that was in it? When I discovered this, I stopped buying toys for my babies. Just give them odd things that you don't have use for... like empty plastic juice bottles, biscuit boxes, kasuku containers, plastic cups etc. When they get bored with one [and this happens very quickly!!] change to a different one. Saves you a lot of money. After my son lost three balls over the fence, I decided to make him one with old newspapers. it lasted for almost two years - he used to care very good care of it. I guess its because he saw the amount of labour I put into it. Now he is making paper balls for his kid bro. Nothing is real unless it can be named; nothing has value unless it can be sold; money is worthless unless you spend it.
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Rank: Elder Joined: 5/21/2013 Posts: 2,841 Location: Here
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Rank: Elder Joined: 2/26/2012 Posts: 15,980
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mukiha wrote:murchr wrote:Decorate that room in a way that makes her want to live there. Yeah right! Adults have no clue what makes babies happy. Have you ever noticed that a baby will be more interested in a carton box than the toy that was in it? When I discovered this, I stopped buying toys for my babies. Just give them odd things that you don't have use for... like empty plastic juice bottles, biscuit boxes, kasuku containers, plastic cups etc. When they get bored with one [and this happens very quickly!!] change to a different one. Saves you a lot of money. After my son lost three balls over the fence, I decided to make him one with old newspapers. it lasted for almost two years - he used to care very good care of it. I guess its because he saw the amount of labour I put into it. Now he is making paper balls for his kid bro. The child here is a 2 and half year old gal. Decoration of a room does not in any way mean that you should buy toys. By decorate i mean make the room interesting. Play with colors that excite her (Pink, yellow, light blue etc..)be creative either by painting or having stickers/wall papers etc. Incorporate cushions and exciting beddings. "There are only two emotions in the market, hope & fear. The problem is you hope when you should fear & fear when you should hope: - Jesse Livermore .
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Rank: Member Joined: 3/6/2008 Posts: 632
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@Rahatupu, Children best respond to routine and the earlier you have this in place the better for you.My deelets have always slept with the same routine of bath - milk - stories - bed routine and i may be lucky as this has worked, they both moved to their rooms at 9 months sleeping in their own cots. However your case is fairly common and what works varies from child to child. However back to the routine what a child needs is consistency, whenever he cries at your door wake up no speaking, no eye contact and return him to his bed, you might do this for a few hours in the first night and its very physically exhausting (heck no-one says this journey will be easy)but a helluva lot more worthwhile,soon he will get the message and by day 3 this will be a thing of the past. Remember the key is consistency children dont cope well with disruptions. All the best. The greatest danger in times of turbulence is not the turbulence; it is to act with yesterday's logic.
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