...the generalisations may come from stats which arent proven scientifically...mostly from experiences that others have had in the past,you may be called aside and an uncle goes like dont marry from such and such a tribe you will end up like your uncle so and so who was left and the wifey went abroad not realising that the dynamics for every of the relationships that failed is different...I base my relationships on what the person will offer and table in terms of virtues,honesty,humility,gentleness etc should be at the core of what you,d want from the other party not forgetting that you should also table some virtues to balance things off,you shouldnt expect much when you yourself cant deliver anything...people should never ever base a relationship on what the society thinks is right,we were given brains to think at the end of everything its always you and your better half,the society will never give you a free hall pass to the goodies of the land because you chose according to their eyes what is right...why not be different then,why not choose what according to you is right and acceptable in your own eyes and heart...its good to be different at times,its good to have the satisfaction that what you did or are doing is right in your own eyes.

When I was young,I thought money was everything.Now I am older and wiser, I know money is everything.

1. Does a society have the right to judge what is right and wrong in relationship matters?
If not,why then do we hear stuff like,'in our society women are gold diggers and men are womanisers'.
If every man in a particular society believes that all women are after his gold,why not become an expert gold digger instead of trying too hard to prove that you are not, to an already 'corrupted mind?' Your 'principles may be mistaken you know.

-The reason you cannot choose to be different is because it may not work in your favour.

How do the very poor people do it?
Those who can't afford roasted maize by the roadside for their sweethearts?
Is the quality of their romance different from those served in 5 star establishment?
I know you are thinking that we date those whom we spend most of our time with and so a poor lady in the slum is most likely to date a dude from there and it's therefore no big deal what they can or cannot afford, since it's their way of life.

But that alone is enough proof that there can be love without finance.

...@ essyk...this is where you youngans go wrong...if one cannot advise you from experience why would you want to rely on hypotheses for advise especially on issues related to opposite sex unions???

just take it this way, a spinster cannot tell you about matrimonial set up neither can a bachelor...I therefore expect that all that you are reading here that is not motivated by experience, is just but uncalled for theories...

I will give you a story that my grandpa gave me a long time ago....that...one day a hegoat (mahegoat divide by ma..) fell sick and every one of the she goat came to know about it...the she goats decided to go and visit him as hegoat was their long time friend...

on the appointed date they went to see the hegoat and they were fully adorned and beautiful indeed. unfortunately, where he was held inpatient could only accommodate one extra animal...So the first she goat went in and after a couple of minutes she came out...very quiet with the mouth hard shut...The other she goats tried to ask her what she had seen,but she remained quiet and would not open her mouth to talk...eventually when she opened her mouth to talk she told them to go right in and find out for themselves...she went her own way.

The second one went in and she came out with a facial appearance resembling the first one and she said the same thing...the third, the fourth...till the last one...experience!!!

@ guka...tell them!!!

Will be back!!!

...thats where the wazee,s go wrong no disrespect,just coz someone iz young doesnt negate the kind of advice he/she can give rem I learn from those who are ahead of me,making me bigger and better.

I believe you are not able to feel that emotion called LOVE if you are constantly on an empty stomach and not out of choice but out of circumstances such as lack of money to buy food. How would you feel love when you are always thinking of ridding yourself of those hunger pangs?

@ maka...no wonder the society is falling apart not because the elders/wazees are not advising the youth but because the youth does not want to listen...some things will never change no matter how you look at them...

If you are a believer in the Bible i suggest you read the book 1 Kings 12:1-19...come back and tell me, "hey kaigangio, you were wrong!!!"

...maybe i should have rephrased as you rightly put it,wazee should be listened but shoukd you pick everythn?if a mzee goes out hanyaring' ndogo ndogos living the wife at home he has no right to tell me anythn about being faithful

You still don't get it Essyk?!! What was in the HEGOATS room could only be known by those who went in. We did not go in, Kaigangio did not go in. Only the she goats went in and not one of them talked so we do not know what was in there but each of the She goats that went in KNEW and KNOWS. Got it?!