Alot of men will be thinking about the anticipated grand finale, when the clothes start tumbling down. Some might call such men, sexually immature.
A sexually mature man will recognize the vulnerability his lover is exposing herself to... She's anxious about the size of her breasts, her potty, sagging thighs, squishy cianda, the look and scent of her 'landing strip'. And will constantly verbally reassure her that she's wonderful (lol... that is, if she is). Wanaume muwache kunyamaza kitandani!
On a related note, and to quote Mantak Chia... it's amazing how people will go out of their way to look sexy, to attract a mate (pun not intended), yet they have not worked on the most important 'item', watu wafanye kegels!
That said, bonoks should be enjoyed in marriage. If one gets hurt, emotionally or otherwise, fornicating or adulterating huo ni mwiba wa kujitakia. My swa tells me, hauambiwi pole!