While driving an auto transmission,you lack tha ability to cut off a matatu. While driving on Thika Rd,keep away from those long Starlingard buses coz they use two lanes esp when taking a corner. While on Waiyaki Way,look out for pedestrians who pop out unexpectedly while crossing tha road. NEVER overtake when there's jam on Kiambu Rd or else you'll get to work at 12noon thanks to 2 no-nonsense traffic cops on motorbikes. If you get lucky on Nkr Highway tha section btwn Nkr and Naivasha,you might run over some game meat-cum-free nyam chom,no questions asked. Gentlemen,ukipewa fellatio hakikisha windows ni tinted na roadi sio busy coz concentration itakuwa elsewhere. And all roads are open to wannabe stunt motorists from 11pm.

It is a criminal offence to be overtaken by a lady.

Mungu alikuzawadia maisha,sasa ushachezea.

-If yu have to drink and drive,please take milk
-Remember to respect other road users
-Note that driving is akin to holding a machine gun...fun but risky
-Men...Avoid carrying female friends who deliberately expose their deeper thailand and engage you while driving. Yu ultimately lose attention on the road and....only God knows what next.

It's not where yu are,but where yu want to be.

The matatu guys r damn gud. Dnt yield to their intimidating tactics,they knw when 2brake n they r gud at it. Nowadays I kata them lyk nonsense...Btw if u wanna test ua ultimate driving skills,try juja road...has the highest matatu density,n probably the angriest most notorious drivers! They dare u,u dare them back coz they aint actually crazy...pretenders

The only reason why some people are still alive is coz its illegal to shoot them!!

Have you noticed the number of skid marks on the expanded Mombasa road?Looks like drivers don't like the lane markings and are busy driving and breaking on the white paint so as to make the road one big lane....