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Weddings: The newest form of exploitation
Nabwire
#41 Posted : Tuesday, December 06, 2011 9:27:09 PM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 7/22/2011
Posts: 1,325
Burning Spear wrote:
This is absolutely true. The super cons are ur friends. I have been conned severally by friends and those village mates who look for your contacts even from your parents back in the village.

The most painful is of a lady friend who invited me coz we were drinking buddies,I felt touched and gave 10k to their useless goat eating even when I ate only one piece of meat (cant remember whether it was from actual goat or a maasai zebu) and the rest was muchere na mukimo. After their weeding,the stupid couples separated 18 days later ...yes 18 days later. My 10k was gone and a duvets gift which had cost me 7k.

Ata leo hiyo 17k inaniuma even if it sounds small to some.

I will personally never do a wedding and if Mrs Spear want one,my church (Roman Catholic) allows 4 pax ie couplee and witnesses which can be done one early morning.Alternatively, AG yuko but I will never get stressed by things that dont add value in my life.



LOL thats funny, I guess early morning is to ensure no guests!!!! Hata mama na baba??? Ama they are the witnesses....Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly
Tommy
#42 Posted : Tuesday, December 06, 2011 9:50:45 PM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 12/9/2010
Posts: 894
Location: Nairobi
glad most of you share my view.
Don't wait for the Last Judgment. It happens every day. ~Albert Camus, The Fall, 1956
Lolest!
#43 Posted : Tuesday, December 06, 2011 10:56:58 PM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 3/18/2011
Posts: 12,069
Location: Kianjokoma
Im shocked that over 40 posts there is no dissenting voice. Wish wazua could be lyk that on politics. I attend comms for friends n workmates n i dont think its a bad thing. It is part of todays Kenyan culture! It is among the few times when people meet and plan stuff together. Good for reunions etc. Many people earn less than 100k pm n yet want to hold a nice(not xtravagant) wedding. They want the parents to b involved n friends too. How will they afford it with a salo of 40k? Society came up with these comms which are much like merry go rounds where those who cant afford costly events can raise the funds. They will also be required to chip in for their friends later. Granted, some have abused this thing but on the whole I think its ok. Like this guy who had a huge comm with his parents friends dominating. The young kept off or took low profile roles in the close to 100 member comm!
Laughing out loudly smile Applause d'oh! Sad Drool Liar Shame on you Pray
pariah
#44 Posted : Wednesday, December 07, 2011 2:26:06 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 11/24/2011
Posts: 833
I am impressed by the number of people who think the harambee for weddings is a con, to be honest in real life I am a pariah on this one. I believe people should plan for their needs and live within their means. The same applies for the michangos to send your tois to private uni or parallel, if you give birth to a kid today, you know that he/she will need to be in uni in 19 years time, its not a f***ing emergency.

Having said that, where there is real genuine need please always lend a hand, that what makes Africans unique, the togetherness

Best wedding I ever saw was Githongo's the anti corruption Czar, look it up on youtube, thats how i would do it halafu change nitanunua plot
jamplu
#45 Posted : Wednesday, December 07, 2011 7:29:59 AM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 3/25/2010
Posts: 939
Location: Nai
Lolest! wrote:
Im shocked that over 40 posts there is no dissenting voice. Wish wazua could be lyk that on politics. I attend comms for friends n workmates n i dont think its a bad thing. It is part of todays Kenyan culture! It is among the few times when people meet and plan stuff together. Good for reunions etc. Many people earn less than 100k pm n yet want to hold a nice(not xtravagant) wedding. They want the parents to b involved n friends too. How will they afford it with a salo of 40k? Society came up with these comms which are much like merry go rounds where those who cant afford costly events can raise the funds. They will also be required to chip in for their friends later. Granted, some have abused this thing but on the whole I think its ok. Like this guy who had a huge comm with his parents friends dominating. The young kept off or took low profile roles in the close to 100 member comm!



if you can't afford don't go for it! AG only requires 1250.

masukuma
#46 Posted : Wednesday, December 07, 2011 8:54:58 AM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 10/4/2006
Posts: 13,823
Location: Nairobi
I must admit, I have been part of committees that have raised money for friends of ours. Some money for my wedding was raised by a committee. however raising money is not the role of the committee. esp. raising such things as DOWRY, RINGS, SUITS, HONEYMOON???? - all this is personal and one should cut their coat according to their clothe e.t.c
I can agree with the raising of money to partially feed the masses and organize for transport and the keyword is PARTIAL. however the best use for a committee is logistics, running after service providers and the likes.
All Mushrooms are edible! Some Mushroom are only edible ONCE!
Kwanini
#47 Posted : Wednesday, December 07, 2011 9:05:57 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 1/28/2009
Posts: 353
Location: Cloud
feel cheated... having contributed to so many weddings. are majority of wazuans already wedded hence the fait accompli? by same argument should we attend burial arrangements- people should have insurance? , harambees for the sick [why dont they have medical cover?] rushing a sick neighbour to hospital at night- shouldn't he call an ambulance?

Aren't social norms ingrained in us, as we grow... no man is an island, what we should be against is sheer exhibitionism.
"For i am the master and the captain of my fate"
kingfisher
#48 Posted : Wednesday, December 07, 2011 9:07:14 AM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 4/9/2008
Posts: 2,824
Lolest! wrote:
Im shocked that over 40 posts there is no dissenting voice. Wish wazua could be lyk that on politics. I attend comms for friends n workmates n i dont think its a bad thing. It is part of todays Kenyan culture! It is among the few times when people meet and plan stuff together. Good for reunions etc. Many people earn less than 100k pm n yet want to hold a nice(not xtravagant) wedding. They want the parents to b involved n friends too. How will they afford it with a salo of 40k? Society came up with these comms which are much like merry go rounds where those who cant afford costly events can raise the funds. They will also be required to chip in for their friends later. Granted, some have abused this thing but on the whole I think its ok. Like this guy who had a huge comm with his parents friends dominating. The young kept off or took low profile roles in the close to 100 member comm!


wewe @Laughing out loudly umeniharibia mood yangu sasa!! Na vile nilikuwa nimeamka on the right side.
When I have money, I get rid of it quickly, lest it find a way into my heart.
Burning Spear
#49 Posted : Wednesday, December 07, 2011 9:29:31 AM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 7/22/2008
Posts: 1,139
MaichBlack wrote:
freiks wrote:
MaichBlack wrote:
Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause

Especially spendthrift!

Some even have the nerve to invite "friends" and committee members for a thanks giving "goat eating" a couple of weeks after the wedding only for them to get there and realize you need to buy an overpriced "flower" which is basically entry fee. You get in and realize the "goat eating party" doesn't even have a goat Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly .

Reminds me of a guy i met at Club Betty's one evening watching chelsea -arsenal game, even before the game started he was tipsy as we discussed what we expect from the game. I had audacity of asking why he started drinking so early even before Drogba tested Jens on the posts. The guy told me he went for a birthday party for a friends kid and decided to buy a Fire Engine toy as gift, when he reached the place to enter you buy a white handkerchief at 250kshs, then when he gave the gift he was told that the truck needs fuel, he gave 500ksh but was told that fuel to go to the field but not to return so he parted with a K. After that he got an imaginary call excused himself and made it to betty's in time, interestingly the guy he left at the party called him to say that the guys are requesting for the spare tire for the truck, the guy just cut off the phone wrote a message to his dude and said meet me at betty's when you are through and switched off the phone

Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly

Some of this "parties" are pure fund raisers. Someone is broke (or realizes shares are selling at a bargain - LOL) and decides to throw a birthday "party" for junior!!!

Then there are those "kuzindikisha" gimmicks. First the guy waits until everyone changas as much as possible then they start "kuzindikisha" business. "Spendthrift ametoa elfu tatu. Nani atamzindikisha? @BurningSpear zindikisha rafiki yako na elfu mbili (never mind @BurningSpear has already parted with 5k - 10k). Na yeye @Burningspear atazindikishwa na @McReggae na elfu moja...." Brary Gasket!!!


Tunaomba sirikali iingilie kati.
"You're not supposed to be so blind with patriotism that you can't face reality. Wrong is wrong, no matter who says it". Malcolm X
Burning Spear
#50 Posted : Wednesday, December 07, 2011 9:38:14 AM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 7/22/2008
Posts: 1,139
Kwanini wrote:
feel cheated... having contributed to so many weddings. are majority of wazuans already wedded hence the fait accompli? by same argument should we attend burial arrangements- people should have insurance? , harambees for the sick [why dont they have medical cover?] rushing a sick neighbour to hospital at night- shouldn't he call an ambulance?

Aren't social norms ingrained in us, as we grow... no man is an island, what we should be against is sheer exhibitionism.



No one has mentioned here about harambees to assist in medical bills,school fees,burial and the like deserving events.Infact,I feel it is our responsibility as a society to assist and I dont complain.

The issue is wending game super con.

Who said for you to live happily,you have to do a glamorous wending.

I am a staunch Roman Catholic and our teachings are against what you cant afford. Thats how jubilee wendings came about,or a couple and two witnesses period !
"You're not supposed to be so blind with patriotism that you can't face reality. Wrong is wrong, no matter who says it". Malcolm X
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