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Intelligent police officer on the bible
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Sure
#1 Posted : Tuesday, November 01, 2011 12:16:15 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 9/9/2010
Posts: 546
Location: Garissa
Do Police Officers Read The Bible?



Upon being stopped by a traffic officer on a fictitious driving violation, a Pastor sensing trouble, even when he knew he had committed no offence, yelled back: “I am a pastor not a thief”

The officer replied: “Please, leave that pastor thing. In any case, if you are indeed a pastor, then you must have a Bible in your car. Bring it.” The Pastor speedily brought out his Bible to prove his honesty. “Please read Matthew 5:25-26 to me.” Said the police man.

Incredulously, Pastor opened to the recommended passage and read: “Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still with him on the way, or he may hand you over to a judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. I tell you the truth; you will not get out until you have paid the last penny”

The perplexed man of God “QUIETLY” made an “offering” of some shillings to his newly found “preacher”.

The Officer collected his “Gonyo”(bribe) and said to the pastor, “End of service go in peace and argue no more.”
Wisdom to detect when share prices hit rock bottom.
When interest on bonds keep going up, you know the bear run is on high street. When interest on bonds start leveling, the bear has met the bull and they have hit rock bottom. When the interest rates on bonds start coming down, the bull has overpowered the bear and you better be riding the bull.
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YesuWangu
#2 Posted : Tuesday, November 01, 2011 12:31:10 PM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 8/11/2010
Posts: 1,588
Funny cop.

People are free to interpret the bible how they please.

1. Some use it to get riches and mercedes'es
2. Others use it to prove God does not exist
3. Others use it to condemn Iran and Hamas even Obama & democrats
4. Others use it to seek eternal life
5. Others use it to enslave others
6. Etc
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FancyFace
#3 Posted : Tuesday, November 01, 2011 12:34:53 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 7/31/2009
Posts: 743
Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly hiyo ni noma

does this mean that what we percieve as a bribe could as well be 'settling matters quickly'..hiiiyaaa

Problems can get out of proportion, and not only in the wee small hours. Don't let the problems eclipse the Master. Let the Master eclipse the problems.
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bkismat
#4 Posted : Tuesday, November 01, 2011 12:54:33 PM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 10/23/2009
Posts: 2,375
Just had to confirm this. In an online bible. Let me check on a real bible.
It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt...
-Mark Twain
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kichwangumu
#5 Posted : Tuesday, November 01, 2011 1:35:09 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 6/15/2009
Posts: 106
and to add on that
ad·ver·sar·y/ˈadvərˌserē/ is a Noun meaning
1. One's opponent in a contest conflict or dispute.
2. The Devil.

Adversary may refer to: In Judeo-Christian religion: Satan, whose name means "adversary" in Hebrew (wikipedia)
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Sure
#6 Posted : Tuesday, November 01, 2011 1:50:48 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 9/9/2010
Posts: 546
Location: Garissa
The thought is as good as the action.

You have heard the commandment that says, "You must not commit adultery". But I say anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. So, if your eye causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than to for your whole body to be thrown into eternal fire.

Matt 5: 27 - 29 or Mark 9:47-48
Wisdom to detect when share prices hit rock bottom.
When interest on bonds keep going up, you know the bear run is on high street. When interest on bonds start leveling, the bear has met the bull and they have hit rock bottom. When the interest rates on bonds start coming down, the bull has overpowered the bear and you better be riding the bull.
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WWW
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Sure
#7 Posted : Tuesday, November 01, 2011 1:55:09 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 9/9/2010
Posts: 546
Location: Garissa
It is the Good News of the Lord. If you do not take heed, I wonder what Christianity is all about.

Is it not clearly written,

"But I say that a man who divorces his wife, unless she has been unfaithful, causes her to commit adultery. And anyone who marries a divorced woman also commits adultery".

Simple, clear, and straight to the point.
Wisdom to detect when share prices hit rock bottom.
When interest on bonds keep going up, you know the bear run is on high street. When interest on bonds start leveling, the bear has met the bull and they have hit rock bottom. When the interest rates on bonds start coming down, the bull has overpowered the bear and you better be riding the bull.
Back to top
WWW
  |
Sure
#8 Posted : Tuesday, November 01, 2011 2:00:29 PM
Rank: Member

Joined: 9/9/2010
Posts: 546
Location: Garissa
When Mutunga failed to swear by the bible or Koran, he was taken to court. I wonder why the Judicially would demand you vow by the bible while the same bible says, "But I say, do not make any vows! ....Just say a simple, 'yes, I will', or 'No, I won't.' Anything beyond this is from the evil one".

Matt 5: 33-37
Wisdom to detect when share prices hit rock bottom.
When interest on bonds keep going up, you know the bear run is on high street. When interest on bonds start leveling, the bear has met the bull and they have hit rock bottom. When the interest rates on bonds start coming down, the bull has overpowered the bear and you better be riding the bull.
Back to top
WWW
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Kaigangio
#9 Posted : Tuesday, November 01, 2011 2:01:07 PM
Rank: Elder

Joined: 2/27/2007
Posts: 2,768
Sure wrote:
The thought is as good as the action.

You have heard the commandment that says, "You must not commit adultery". But I say anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. So, if your eye causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than to for your whole body to be thrown into eternal fire.

Matt 5: 27 - 29 or Mark 9:47-48


so, @ sure, if you were the pastor what would you have done assuming that you were going to deliver a summon to your cogregation??
...besides, the presence of a safe alone does not signify that there is money inside...
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FundamentAli
#10 Posted : Tuesday, November 01, 2011 2:45:00 PM
Rank: Veteran

Joined: 11/4/2008
Posts: 1,289
Location: Nairobi
@Sure,

You should have acknowledged the source. This appeared some few weeks ago on the 'Letter from London' Sunday Nation
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