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House-helps and HIV
Rank: Member Joined: 10/8/2010 Posts: 281
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Rank: Member Joined: 2/20/2009 Posts: 658
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What on earth would you be doing in her room assuming that it is the man who made the discovery????? 
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Rank: Member Joined: 9/29/2010 Posts: 216 Location: Kenia
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Heard of this from a family friend as well. They were 'Kind' enough to transfer the house help to their rural residence as a care taker, on a higher salary. But what of those of us living with house helps who are not sure of their HIV status but are infected ??? Am not victimising anyone here but...
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Rank: Elder Joined: 11/19/2007 Posts: 2,047
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@ Otienosmall,this just shows the stigma that people who test HIV positive face. There are all these misconceptions that people have about HIV. And then you bring in the househelp angle,it just looks like it adds to the multiple discrimination that some people face. ..............A woman,who is a househelp who is HIV positive :(...............
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Rank: Member Joined: 9/29/2010 Posts: 216 Location: Kenia
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@ Famooz, dont think of it as discrimination.
Case 1; you have your 2 year old toddler who likes using the house helps tooth brush
Case 2; your 3 year old uses the same tooth pick the house help uses
Case 3; the house help has just served you with fruit salad (in which blood from a knife cut oozed into)
case 4; your house help has just played a 'cha baba na cha mama' game with your 13 year old son (these things happen a lot!)
The list is endless
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Rank: Elder Joined: 12/9/2009 Posts: 6,592 Location: Nairobi
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otienosmall wrote: one day you accidentally tumbles into her handbag Accidentally? I have never accidentally tumbled into a handbag or someone else's pocket.
BBI will solve it :)
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Rank: Member Joined: 10/8/2010 Posts: 281
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@ segemia…wifey saw…@ famooz…wish had another job to give her…
Surely victimization aside were there no small children at home there would be no problem, but think of a toddler…think the risk of baby getting infected is quite high…would you risk it yourself???
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Rank: Chief Joined: 8/24/2009 Posts: 5,909 Location: Nairobi
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2012 wrote:otienosmall wrote: one day you accidentally tumbles into her handbag Accidentally? I have never accidentally tumbled into a handbag or someone else's pocket. @2012, look at the bigger picture and address @otienosmall's concerns...now we are dissecting his every word...unless you speak on a lighter note
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Rank: Elder Joined: 11/19/2007 Posts: 2,047
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sihingwa wrote:@ Famooz, dont think of it as discrimination.
Case 1; you have your 2 year old toddler who likes using the house helps tooth brush
Case 2; your 3 year old uses the same tooth pick the house help uses
Case 3; the house help has just served you with fruit salad (in which blood from a knife cut oozed into)
case 4; your house help has just played a 'cha baba na cha mama' game with your 13 year old son (these things happen a lot!)
The list is endless Well true true...but my point is that using the househelp example to make a point ( probably a valid one) does nothing to remove the stigma that they face in the very homes that can almost not do without them...... it is not the househelp then,it can be your sister who u asked to come live with you after campus ? or your cousin? @ 2012,you raise an important point  @ Otieno, so this is for real? :(
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Rank: Elder Joined: 12/9/2009 Posts: 6,592 Location: Nairobi
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nostoppingthis wrote:2012 wrote:otienosmall wrote: one day you accidentally tumbles into her handbag Accidentally? I have never accidentally tumbled into a handbag or someone else's pocket. @2012, look at the bigger picture and address @otienosmall's concerns...now we are dissecting his every word...unless you speak on a lighter note What's the big picture? That you never trusted her in the first place? Why didn't you get rid of her back then? Assuming she's been with you for 1 or 2 years and your child is still negative would you still fire her? And when you fire her and she can no-longer afford her ARVs do you know you'd have condemned her to death?
BBI will solve it :)
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Rank: Member Joined: 10/8/2010 Posts: 281
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@famooz if it was relative the situation is different; this is a person who will remain close to you forever so in that case you talk over it and you devise ways of helping her cope with the situation, but a house help you may one time cross path and you never know what she may do to your children @2012… ‘macho hayana pazia’ and one is bound to get careless at time and expose her deep buried secrete…
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Rank: Elder Joined: 5/27/2008 Posts: 3,760
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sihingwa wrote:@ Famooz, dont think of it as discrimination.
Case 1; you have your 2 year old toddler who likes using the house helps tooth brush
Case 2; your 3 year old uses the same tooth pick the house help uses
Case 3; the house help has just served you with fruit salad (in which blood from a knife cut oozed into)
case 4; your house help has just played a 'cha baba na cha mama' game with your 13 year old son (these things happen a lot!)
The list is endless Case 1: Yet to see a toddler brush its teeth. Case 2: I think a toddler picking milk teeth is amazing. Case 3: Once blood is exposed, the HIV in it dies, unless it immediately drops onto an exposed wound. BTW this reason negates Cases 1 and 2. Case 4: Maybe. You should be glad she knows her status and is on ARV. She MUST have been taken through counseling on positive living and how not to spread or have a recurrence, so Case 4 becomes a remote probability.
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Rank: Veteran Joined: 4/16/2010 Posts: 906 Location: Nairobi
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HEHEHE! Look at this thread! I keep overestimating Wazuans! Kuweni serious lakini.
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Rank: Member Joined: 10/17/2008 Posts: 338 Location: Kenya
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while i may not be an expert in this area i think it depends on how you treat your house help. you may not want to make her your best friend but there is a kind of respect that you can give each other that will help both of you. In that regard then you are able to talk on matters of HIV/AIDS and you can even go with her to a VCT centre and have both of you tested. i have aways wondered why one would mistreat a house help yet you trust her enough to leave your kids with them for close to 10hours each day. Think the unthinkable but wear a dark suit
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Rank: Member Joined: 8/11/2009 Posts: 302
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Gordon Gekko wrote:sihingwa wrote:@ Famooz, dont think of it as discrimination.
Case 1; you have your 2 year old toddler who likes using the house helps tooth brush
Case 2; your 3 year old uses the same tooth pick the house help uses
Case 3; the house help has just served you with fruit salad (in which blood from a knife cut oozed into)
case 4; your house help has just played a 'cha baba na cha mama' game with your 13 year old son (these things happen a lot!)
The list is endless Case 1: Yet to see a toddler brush its teeth. Case 2: I think a toddler picking milk teeth is amazing. Case 3: Once blood is exposed, the HIV in it dies, unless it immediately drops onto an exposed wound. BTW this reason negates Cases 1 and 2. Case 4: Maybe. You should be glad she knows her status and is on ARV. She MUST have been taken through counseling on positive living and how not to spread or have a recurrence, so Case 4 becomes a remote probability. @ Gekko, Clearly you have never spent time with toddlers or if you have, they were very slow toddlers. Mine inserts ear buds into his ears, "combs" his hair and will try to serve you food (most of the time he purs the food on the table, because of the spoon is too heavy). He even inserts the key into the ignition and the flash drive into the USB port of my laptop. These concerns are legitimate but what is important is not to discriminate the househelp based on status. It could even be that your wife was delivered by a HIV + obstetrician/midwife or infant/toddler has been in the hands of HIV + relative before. Most people are not malicious enough to deliberatley infect the toddler and in case accidental exposure happens and they are responsible enough to alert you on time, I don't know if a toddler can survive PEP. I guess talking to the househelp after realising that (first begin with an apology- what were you doing in her purse?) will do. But ultimately as a mother, instinct rules. If your heart says you send her away, just do it humanely.
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Rank: Member Joined: 10/8/2010 Posts: 281
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Thank you all for your advice on the situation. I got some very objective observations from many of you and of course a few other weird school of thoughts (2012, KenyanLyrics et al.) which is understandable coz in every society you find people at distinct stages of maturity…….as a family having discussed the pro and cons of the situation, we decided to humanely let her go and my conscious tells me that this is in no way discriminative
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Rank: Elder Joined: 11/19/2007 Posts: 2,047
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otienosmall wrote:Thank you all for your advice on the situation. I got some very objective observations from many of you and of course a few other weird school of thoughts (2012, KenyanLyrics et al.) which is understandable coz in every society you find people at distinct stages of maturity…….as a family having discussed the pro and cons of the situation, we decided to humanely let her go and my conscious tells me that this is in no way discriminative @ Otienosmall,just out of curiosity,will you get your next househelp tested?
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Rank: Member Joined: 10/8/2010 Posts: 281
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@famooz its rather difficult coz most of the time wives get them under crisis, they wake up one morning and just tells you they are leaving, that time you have other plans so your best bet is to rush to a bureau and pick one. Then this is trial and error you will have to ‘try’ as times as many as three before you end up with a good one no matter how well you treat them, so surely you can’t have all these tested. Its good to trust and just hope
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Rank: Elder Joined: 11/26/2008 Posts: 2,097
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otienosmall wrote:Thank you all for your advice on the situation. I got some very objective observations from many of you and of course a few other weird school of thoughts (2012, KenyanLyrics et al.) which is understandable coz in every society you find people at distinct stages of maturity…….as a family having discussed the pro and cons of the situation, we decided to humanely let her go and my conscious tells me that this is in no way discriminative Read the HIV and Aids control Act please! Discrimination in the workplace. 31. (1) Subject to subsection (2), no person shall be-
(a) denied access to any employment for which he is qualified; or
(b) transferred, denied promotion or have his employment terminated,
on the ground only of his actual, perceived or suspected HIV status.
(2) Subsection (1) shall not apply in any case where an employer can prove, on application to the Tribunal that the requirements of the employment in question are that a person be in a particular state of health or medical or clinical condition. @Otieno ndogo Its you who needs counselling, period. "Never regret, if its good, its wonderful. If its bad, its experience."
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Rank: Elder Joined: 11/26/2008 Posts: 2,097
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In addition, section 32 of the same act adds, 33. (1) A person's freedom of abode, lodging, or travel, within or outside Kenya, shall not be denied or restricted on the grounds only of the person's actual, perceived or suspected HIV status. "Never regret, if its good, its wonderful. If its bad, its experience."
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