True, they worked! Everyone knew their roles, wasn't about love - I wonder how many men know their roles now after all in this age men are presumed guilty unless proven otherwise then the cycle starts again. When I was a 'newly wed' I used to feel the urge to lie because even the simplest of question my wife would ask sounded like an accusation eg your boy will as you: "Chief uko mtaa gani?" while your wife will as: "Where are you?". Then I learned that that's how women talk.

I am very young & happily unmarried... feel free to judge me harshly.

Love is not a basis for any marriage. It is a feeling / emotion. Like anger, joy, sadness. It exists WITHIN us. It does not exist WITHOUT us. It therefore does no depend on who we marry but on us.

Some things are good for us... some are bad, eg. Tusker, Church, Drugs, Good exercise... we choose which of these we love and enjoy... you may find that you love, hate or find some of these boring. Our opinions will invariably differ.

Some people are good for us... some are bad... we choose who to love & who to be with... we may choose someone that we love but that is bad for us - like narcotics, or someone that we hate that is good for us - like exercise!

I think we can choose who is good for us and then love them... then tell them why you love them & why you married them so that they don't change!

The key to a a good/great marriage is communication. No communication, you will have problems up the wazuu. People say it all the time but when confronted with issues, communication is thrown out the window pap...Patience and forgiveness very important too..

On another note,in our time, the best place to get a mate was on campus. Most of the guys who got their wives while on campus are still together today.. Koinange Street was not an issue then...

I'm not married, but I've thought now for a long time that modern people's quest for an equal partner is their eventual undoing in marriage. It is my understanding that equality is an ideological farce that, when achieved, creates chaos. In any partnership, a heirarchy is necessary so as to maintain order. Hence, when looking for a partner, for order's sake you should look for one who's not on the same level as you in key areas, especially finance. Do the more experienced wazuans agree with this point of view?

Haiya, no wazua lady is happily married?

@user,
I am one person who would have disagreed with you a few years back. I believe I have a lot of respect for hardworking women who are doing well. I have a few lady friends wamesoma and was thinking of taking it further with one of them. But I continue to hear the kind of advise you have given here from many married men.

So, I am taking your advise seriously. I have heard this from many responsible married men. But then, sasa huyu wa form four...tutakuwa na story gani...si we will bore each other vibaya. Ama how do well educated men go about having happy times na huyu wa form four? Please let me know your answer.

So, quite complaining that there is no love in your marriage and start giving to your partner...without expecting them to give anything back.

Mwende ako wapi? Mbona hajatoa maoni?

@user,

Hahaha...very funny. Had to laugh. But thanks...I am taking your advise seriously.

Some educated women regard marriage as slavery. They should just remain single instead of going into relationships and making a man's life hell-on-earth. THEY SHOULD ALSO GIVE UP HAVING KIDS!!