Most people especially when dating pretend alot. They try and use all means possible to impress each other.

Once married, true colours start to manifest and thats where disappointment begins.

Others get into marriage while in denial. They hope that once married they can 'change & mould' their spouse into perfect persons. This rarely happens

Another class of people are those who get married for wrong reasons eg because their peers, agemates, school mate are wedding, they also join the bandwagon...

Others get married too young and only realise after 5-10 years they missed out enjoying their spinster/bachelor days.... most of the time they will try to catch up....

Marriage is not easy, but it can be BLISS if you have the right partner by your side.....

kanisani is even worse ...as tory is told of man who pretended to be saved and married a lady only after the wedding the guy went out and drunk ile mbaya ......the point alikuwa amenoki manzi na lazima angempata liwe luiwalo evn if means lying in the name of the lord

Seconded!!!

Church is one of the worst places to get a wife. Here is what happens.

Girl joins campus. Girl sleeps with everyone in campus in the first and second year. In third year [and forth year], girl decides it's time to get paid. Most nights she can be found shouting "darling, darling..." along Koinange street. Girl graduates. Quite a number of A's - same as the number of lecturers she slept with. Girl gets job - though she was not as good as the other interviewees - you know how that happened. Girl starts living the fast life. No longer at Koinange - may be. But she still supplements her income with "corporate clients". Time is moving. No boyfriend. No husband. Friends married. Oh what did "I" do? What to do? Off to church. May "I" should join the choir. Boy goes to church. Meets beautiful lady. Has a good 'education'. Gainfully employed. Even in the church choir. Wedding bells. A happy 6 months. Maybe one year. Girl gets bored. money not 'enough'. "We" are not 'happening'. Back to "corporate clients". Boy gets depressed. Discovers Tusker baridi. Demand for beer increase. Prices rise. EABL makes more money. Share price rises. Investor gets more dividends. Oops. I should have stopped at boy discovers Tusker baridi.

Okay, maybe this is in extreme cases. But you get my drift.

Disclaimer: I am not implying that all our sisters or university students or our sisters in the church or choir fall in this category. There are some nice ones - who might actually be the majority - but good luck telling them apart.

Unreal expectations are what kill marriages.

Before you get married, you'll think you husband or wife to be is a very intelligent and very caring person who understands you fully. Wrong! You only think that because you are looking for someone like you. If you're a woman looking for a man who best fits the description in Lionel Richie songs then marry another woman after all isn't Lionel Richie divorced for like a couple of times?

When you marry a woman, always remember that you married a woman so don't get shocked when she will act and behave like one. And for women don't get shocked when the man you married behaves like a man ie forgets not just your birthday but other things too like you waiting outside 20th Century...

But let's be honest, the biggest problem we men have is lying - not cheating but lying.

Happy marriages happen when the two parties are willing to work things out without selfishly thinking about their interests. Then you are able to put up with your partners small peeves as they do the same with you.

And yes, I'm happily married and working on having a thrilling marriage!